Advice
by Hieronym
Summary: Fujioka finally gets desperate, but is sadly as confused as ever.
1. Unfortunate Entrance

_Author's note: For those unfamiliar with the series, Touma=female. Fujioka is just very, very confused._

_Second note: Ugh, the upload thing messed up the italics and spacing without me noticing. Should be fixed now. I had to do it manually...the word document confuses it for some reason_

_Update 5/31/09: Minor proofreading, textual revisions. Implies some things more strongly._

Fujioka raised his hand to the doorbell. He stuck his hand forward-

No, wait. That was wrong. He shook his head, unsettling carefully combed hair, and remembered a conversation from the day before.

_Fujioka! _She had said, thrusting a finger in his face from across the kotatsu.

_What is it, Minami?_ As always, he had been painfully aware of his inability to call her by her familiar name. His tongue would always trip a little before her name, causing the barest hint of hesitation. She never seemed to notice, though.

The proper thing to do, after all this time, was to at least switch to a more familiar form, with an honorific, like Kana-san or Kana-chan.

He blushed, imagining it.

_Arrgh! _He put his hands to his head, shaking it again. _I'm getting off-topic!_

Back to reminiscing.

_You're a real bother, you know that?_

_Eh?! Why?_

_You always ring the doorbell and wait politely by the door when it's already unlocked. What the hell? That bastard Chiaki always makes me go too!_

_Who are you calling a bastard, baka-yaro? It's for your own good! You should be the one to open the door for Fujioka!_

This from the girl who always insisted on sitting between his legs while reading one of her thick textbooks, Chiaki herself. Lately she had been growing taller, and her prominent hair was starting to jut into his neck. There were other reasons to try to get her to stop, but he could never manage the willpower to say no.

_What? How does that even make sense? What kind of logic is that?_—another blow to his heart—_Anyway, the point is, the door is usually unlocked! Just let yourself in! Save me the hassle!_

She was standing now, going for the argumentative advantage of looking down on her opponent, propelled by the boundless energy that drove her into perpetual motion, the same energy that had set his heart throbbing all those months ago, when he first saw her in the sunlight.

He clutched his chest.

_Damn it. How long has it been? How many times have I seen her? And still…_

She had leaned forward, gotten in his face.

_You got that?!_

She pushed him with a finger, in the chest, almost hard enough to topple him over.

_Your hair is in my face, baka-yaro!_ said Chiaki.

Cowed by his own inexpressible emotions, he could only manage a meek:

_Sure, yes, Minami…_ His tongue tripped again.

_Ah, okay, good._ Suddenly subdued, Kana walked back to her side of the kotatsu, folded her legs and returned to her manga. She took a sip of her tea, throat now dry.

It wasn't true that he always rang the doorbell. Sometimes, when he could hear what was going on inside, he let himself in. But to just walk in with no warning…he didn't want to run into Haruka emerging in a towel from the shower. Or worse, Kana.

Not that he hadn't already seen-

He cut off that train of thought and drew himself back into the present.

He swallowed.

_Here goes nothing._

He turned the doorknob and pulled the door outward. No unclothed angels from his dreams assailed his eyes.

_What the hell. I'm being paranoid and I know it. She was right, I've been here enough times…_

As he hung up his jacket, his eyes wandered down to the shoes by the door. Hmm, Chiaki was home, and, ah, Touma. He was here almost as much as Fujioka was, drawn by the inescapable female allure of the household. But Kana wasn't here? Wasn't she the one who had invited him here? Well, she was too much to be confined one place, after all.

He smiled at his own foolish comment, pulling off his sneakers. Ah well, nothing to be done but to greet Chiaki, sit down, and wait while enjoying some of Haruka's excellent tea. No, wait, she wasn't home. Well, he would just have to wait.

He was in an excellent mood.

He turned right towards the open wooden sliding door, right hand raised in greeting, mouth open to speak. He wore stylish jeans and a t-shirt, appropriate for the weekend, and his hair was slightly tousled.

His hand froze mid-wave.

On the ground at the other side of the kotatsu, Chiaki lay on the floor, Touma on top. They were sharing a passionate kiss.

-----------------------

After what seemed like an eternity, they decoupled.

It was Touma who pulled herself upright first.

"That was it, huh? I really don't see the big deal." She leaned back and looked up at the ceiling, pushing hair away from her eyes.

"Really? It seemed rather…interesting." Chiaki seemed pensive. She got up on her elbows.

"That's the first time I've heard you admit anything is interesting. Enjoy it that much?" Touma reoriented her head to look Chiaki in the eyes.

"Shut it, baka-yaro. But you're right. I don't see why Haruka gets so secretive when it comes to things like this. With the way Kana annoys me about this, you'd think it would be something bigger. Or more exciting."

"Ah, who knows?" Touma was leaning back again, back into her customary posture of preparing to take a nap. She grabbed a tangerine that had rolled onto the floor. "Remind me how I let you talk me into this again?"

"You're the only one who won't immediately leak it to Kana. I can't trust Uchida to keep a secret and Yoshino…she's too quiet. Among other things."

"You're being paranoid." Touma tossed the fruit up and caught it. "But no one will know. I guarantee it."

They were too involved to notice Fujioka's presence. For his part, Fujioka hadn't heard a word said, lost in his own private world. One part of his brain was actively engaged in trying to shut down another part that had noticed Chiaki's strong familial resemblance to Kana. Yet another was drawing uncharitable comparisons between himself and Touma. Finally, his mouth groping for words, he managed an incoherent splutter.

They jerked their heads around to look at him. Touma dropped the tangerine, mouth agape.

"I'msosorryI'llleaveyoutwoalone!" He finally managed, and turned counterclockwise to rush for the door.

"Fujioka, wait, this-! Wait up! This-" Touma reached the door and stuck her head out past the edge to yell at him. She stopped.

Fujioka was frozen halfway to the door, hand reaching for his jacket.

_No. This isn't right. I shouldn't be running. I'm Touma's mentor! I teach him soccer! He has no parents, and his brothers are useless! He told me this. So why am I leaving? I can't leave like this. It's my job to stop this! They're too young! Yeah, that's it. No, wait…_

Touma warily watched his back as he muttered to himself, his outer demeanor broken. She watched for long enough that when he finally straightened his back, decision made, she jerked back in surprise.

"Fujioka-"

"Touma." He turned around, his face hard.

"Oh God." Touma wasn't aware she had said it out loud.

"Come with me. We need to talk." He gestured with his hand.

The Banchou had arrived.


	2. A Lecture Gone Awry

_Author's note: So yeah, this is set slightly in the future. Just to be clear._

_Note 2: Advantage to writing in the future: Any inability on your part to accurately depict the characters can be waved off as due to the passage of time. Makes you more confident._

_Update 6/2/09: Minor proofreading, textual revisions. Inserted necessary foreshadowing and fixed a logical contradiction with chapter 6. Inserted some back-story I accidentally left out. I also discovered I've confused Riko (Fujioka's admirer) with Rika (Takeru's On-off girlfriend). Truly a facepalm moment. That's fixed in the other chapters too now..._

"So you got it? It doesn't matter happen much you like her or how well you guys are clicking--which I admit is very well--it's too early for these things! As a guy, you have to restrain yourself!"

"Look, I already explained to you-"

"Yes, yes, I heard what you said. Look, I know you believe that, but-" Here he paused to put his hands on Touma's shoulders, pinning him to the metal balcony railing to make sure he listened.

"-But, and believe me when I say this, there is no way that is Chiaki's real reason for doing such a thing. It might be what she _tells _you, but-" He paused again and backed off, suddenly unsure whether or not to continue the sentence.

Touma sighed, wrapping her arms around herself to try to get warmer in this chilly weather. She hadn't had the time to grab her jacket. The balcony outside the Minami front door seemed especially cold. Maybe it was some kind of wind effect. She peered at the roof, trying to avoid looking at, and therefore giving away, Chiaki, who had one eye stuck out past the slightly ajar door. Touma was also aware that, were it Natsuki in front of her, she would have attempted a headbutt or an escape long ago.

"Anyway," Fujioka continued, "I know girls can be mysterious sometimes. Hell, they can seem impossible to understand. But this kind of thing just does not happen. It just doesn't. She has an agenda. I know that seems like good news to you, but-what is it? What's so funny?"

Touma had suddenly developed a disturbingly mischievous smile which gave Fujioka pause.

"Is that so? Mysterious eh? Well then enlighten me. For example, Kana."

A pause. Fujioka felt the logical spearheads close in.

"Wha-what about Kana?"

"Say she tried the same 'trick' on you? How would you respond? Resist, right?"

Fujioka wore the expression of a man whose chess opponent had just declared, "Mate in six!"

"That's-that's different! We're older anyway!"

"Why? Just because you're in high school and we're not? Haruka might be all smiles now, but make that kind of move on Kana and I won't be accountable for what happens!"

It was Touma now who had Fujioka backed up against the railing, and Touma waving the finger of accountability.

"Besides, I doubt you would have shown compunction when you were in middle school yourself!"

"Yes I would have! It's important to know how to control yourself. It's your duty! It's not all that is important--there's other things too--but age is a major factor. What's important for your case is the age! You just can't do those kinds of things-"

The door swung open. Chiaki stepped out, and accusatory finger already pointed outward.

"And why not? What does it matter? And why won't anyone tell me just what we're trying to avoid? It's not just the kiss, is it?" Her eyes narrowed dangerously and her finger thrust out again for extra emphasis.

_How the hell am I being outwilled and outwitted by two middle-schoolers? _despaired Fujioka privately.

"Look, I can't say anything. You have to ask that of Haruka!"

_That's it, pass the buck. And now for a quick change of subject-_

"Besides, there's no way Kana would ever offer anything like that! And if she ever did, I'd make absolutely sure the circumstances were right before accepting!"

"What am I offering to whom now?"

Fujioka and Touma both jerked backwards. Touma almost tripped. Fujioka placed a hand on the railing to steady himself.

"Geez, I decide to buy some drinks for everyone and I come back to find you guys talking about me behind my back. You can't keep a secret from me! What's going on here?"

She held up a plastic bag full of bottles and cans.

"Kana."

"What is it?"

Chiaki stepped forward.

"I think it's time you told me-"

She was cut off by Touma diving forward to clasp her hands over Chiaki's mouth. As Chiaki struggled and flailed her arms outward, Touma improvised the only explanation she could think of.

"It's...it's because we wanted to surprise you! Yeah, it's a surprise! You caught us in the planning! Heh-heh..." Touma flashed Fujioka a look.

Fujioka knew why Touma was so nervous.

_Don't worry, Touma. I'm not as crass as that. I won't be the one to reveal your secret relationship. I'm a better mentor than that!_

He rubbed the back of his head nervously and said, "Yeah, a surprise! It's uh-"

"A surprise huh. Well, what is it?"

"If we told you, it wouldn't be a surprise, now would it?"

"I see." She sighed, and shifted her shoulders under her stylish heavy coat. "I thought it was more interesting than that. This better not be boring! I'll hold you accountable for this, Fujioka!"

"Right, of course..."

"Come on, let's go inside. I don't know why you guys are standing around out here. Let's go back to the warm kotatsu."'

Touma was the last one inside.

_Ugh. Why'd I stop Chiaki? I don't even have a reason to. Not everyone is as confused as Fujioka. What am I afraid of?_

------------------------------------------

"So this is your surprise, huh."

"Heh, yeah."

_I can't believe this is the only thing we could think of_.

Fujioka sat backwards on the cold wooden chair, chest to chair back, watching anxiously the reaction of the resident of the desk behind him. It had been quite a coup for him to end up again in the same class as Kana, but nabbing the desk in front of her had made him downright ecstatic. Alas, it wasn't quite as amazing as he'd hoped.

In front of him, the love of his life looked down at the box in front of her, brown hair flowing in two streams onto the desk and down the sides of her green-themed uniform. The red ribbon had been casually pulled aside and the pink lid moved to the side; he hoped it wasn't too obvious that he had been compelled to meticulously clean the dust off the surface after it had sat forgotten in his closet for two years. But that wasn't the primary concern right now.

"...So what do you think?"

She maintained her silence.

Voices behind him:

"There's the shameless couple again."

"Shh! They'll hear you."

He turned to fix the two gossips with his best icy-cold stare. Their eyes widened and they fled out the door. He noticed Riko suddenly turn away.

He sighed and turned back. As always, Kana hadn't noticed.

Finally she spoke.

"It's okay, I guess."

"Okay?"

"Yeah. I like the red color, but I'm a bit old to be wearing hair bows like these."

"Well, I thought they'd look..."

"Cute?"

"Yeah..."

More silence. Just when the silence became oppressive-

"I'm disappointed!" She yelled, jumping out of her seat. Behind Fujioka, there was the ruffle of skirts as people turned to stare.

"Eh?"

"I'm disappointed in you, Fujioka! What kind of surprise is this?!"

As she leaned forward to berate him, he made it a point to stare up at her face. Chiaki wasn't the only one who had, ahem, grown.

"Geez, I was expecting some sort of early birthday party for Touma! Or crème brûlée! Or a treasure hunt on a mountain! Or a trip to a mysterious island! Or you dressed up as a girl! Or a-"

She cut herself off, briefly flustered, as if surprised by what she was about to say.

_What kind of ideas are those?!_

"If you were just going to give me some hair bows, then you could have just told me that! This isn't a surprise!"

The people around them wore the look of _There she goes again_. Personally, he still hadn't decided whether she'd gotten more or less insane since she entered high school. His heart fluttered. He wouldn't have admitted it to anyone, but it was precisely her insanity that kept him in love.

He decided he'd reflect on his own sanity at a better time.

"You get zero points for creativity! You hear me? Zer-"

A hand grabbed her shoulder, cutting her off.

"What's that you say?"

Keiko looked...different. More dangerous, somehow. Kana clearly sensed it.

"Oh, heh, hi, Keiko. We were just, uh, practicing for a play. Isn't that right, _Fujioka_?" Suddenly her voice was pleading.

"Er, yes. That's exactly what we're doing."

"Oh, good, I thought you were criticizing him for not being creative enough. But I guess you wouldn't ever do that again, would you?"

"Of course not."

"Well, I was just passing by. I look forward to seeing your play later." Keiko pushed her glasses up her nose.

With that, she walked off.

The moment she was gone-

"Damn her impudence!" cursed Kana, rather quietly, Fujioka noticed.

"Is something wrong? Keiko isn't normally that...threatening."

"No, nothing is wrong. It must be that..." Her voice trailed off.

"Calm down. Remember, we still owe her for getting us into this school."

"That doesn't mean-ack, nevermind."

It was true too. Just before entrance exams, Kana had suddenly announced that it would be unacceptable, absolutely unacceptable, if they went to different schools. He had rather reasonably pointed out that such an assertion was unfair to those of them with, ahem, better academics.

It didn't stop her. She had bullied Keiko into holding near-continuous study sessions for them for weeks, to get them all into the best school possible. It had confused Chiaki so much that she'd taken to trying to do the same for her circle of friends. He wondered how successful she had been.

They'd taken shameful advantage of Haruka's hospitality, but judging by her smiles and buoyant mood, she didn't mind one bit. He understood. He had never seen Kana work so hard on anything. It was her energy and Keiko's genius which had pushed them through it. The sight of her working diligently, pencil writing away, was an image he would remember forever, and it had driven him to work just as hard.

And of course it had worked. Keiko was a gifted teacher. Keiko herself was a shoo-in, and Riko was competent, but to get in two consistent failures like him and Kana...well, it had been enough to motivate his parents to mandatorily invite all four of them into a post-exam dinner celebration. It had been mortifying, especially when they heaped praise on Keiko and his mother started making vague comments about what _nice_ girls they all were. As if they couldn't all see her winking at him. And then it got worse...

Better to not think about that right now. No need to start blushing for no reason.

He knew she'd never admit it, but she was actually keeping her grades up in this hellish school. That wouldn't have happened with the Kana of old. She had changed. They all had. It was the way of things. He looked at her with fresh affection.

By now she had sprawled forward on her desk, head turned to one side, an expression of ennui on her face, hands moving to affix the bows to her hair. Well, no matter what happened, he didn't think Kana would ever look _pleased_ in school.

"Don't think I've forgotten your disappointing surprise just because I'm wearing these damn things."

It _was_ cute.

--------------------------

When the last bell rang, and they packed their bags, he waited for her to issue her standard invitation to visit her place. It didn't arrive. After he had fidgeted for a while, half-heartedly chatting with his friends about the most recent Brazil-Spain soccer match, he decided to go over and ask.

She was leaning back on a desk, Riko and her bullying Keiko during their conversation the same way they always did. Just where had that domineering Keiko from earlier come from?

She was still wearing the bows.

"Kana-"

"Not today."

"But I haven't even-"

"You heard me. I'm tired. I need sleep. Not today. Come on, guys, let's walk home."

Her back told him she didn't want his presence.

He had never been refused before.

----------------

That night he couldn't sleep, still despairing.

This wasn't working.

_Two years, and I've gotten nowhere! And now she hates me._

He turned onto his side.

_What will it take? Nothing works._

He turned again.

_Was she really that mad about the gift? She still wore them, after all._

Toss.

_No, didn't you hear her? She's disappointed in you!_

Turn. This time he clutched his head.

_I'm not creative enough? Not as energetic as her, she means! But how can I keep up with her? It's impossible! What am I supposed to do?_

He punched the pillow next to him.

_Argh!_

And then he had an idea.

_That's crazy_.

An _excellent_ _idea._

_It's madness!_

No, it's your only hope.

_No, it isn't!_

You know it is.

_I can't do that!_

Why not?

_It'd be hypocrisy!_

Desperate times...

_Shut up! How can I even ask something like that?_

Look, do you want her or not?

_You know I do!_

Then do it. Seize your destiny!

_You're right. You're right. I'll do it._

Excellent.

Somewhere, a demonic persona laughed.


	3. Role Reversal

_Author's note: Touma is wrong. Kana is dense is an understatement. When something crosses her event horizon, nothing can escape, not even light! *rimshot*_

_Wait a sec...Mako-chan and Fujioka both came too close to Kana and now neither can escape. Oh shi-_

_Update 6/4/09: Minor proofreading/textual revisions, etc. etc. Inserted reference to past events. Also reintroduction of some Touma pronoun gender juggling. Just to prevent too much comfort with the delusion of a male Touma._

The next day was sunny and warm, atypical of the season.

Fujioka walked down the floor and pushed the elevator call button. He lifted his head to watch the floor numbers light one-by-one, but he didn't really see them. Sweat beaded on his forehead.

_Stupid unpredictable weather._

He stepped into the elevator after the _ding!_ and then turned to face the door. Since no one else was around, he leaned back onto the wall. The trip had taken a lot out of him in this heat. He rested.

_Ding!_

He stepped out and balked at the sunlight from his right. Despite the heat, however, he walked only slowly towards the door of his dreams.

He hesitated briefly before turning the knob and heading straight in.

It had been a small genius of planning on his part to arrive at exactly this time. Kana and Chiaki liked making shopping trips after lunch on Saturdays, coming back with trinkets or items of clothing. They valued each other's opinion on these things, even if they'd never admit it. Such closeness belied their constant bickering.

Similarly, Touma's Saturday routine involved an early morning soccer game with the neighborhood boys, followed by free pampering and lunch from Haruka and then nice long naps, enjoying Chiaki's scent on the wooden floor.

He facepalmed. Where had that thought come from?

Anyway, a look at the shoes while he was taking off his own would confirm success or failure. If Kana were here, she would definitely be unhappy at his arriving without her invitation. Reaching down to untie his shoes, he sighed.

_I feel like some kind of stalker, memorizing everyone's schedules like this and staring at shoes._

He could have just called and arranged a meeting elsewhere. In fact, that was the original plan, but he just couldn't get himself to make the call. He cast his eyes downward.

As planned, Chiaki and Kana were out. Haruka was in. A pair of beaten-up sneakers indicated that so was Touma. But this was unusual: another pair of sneakers, one he didn't recognize. Touma had brought a friend?

"Hi! Fujioka!"

A boy, about Touma's age, jumped up to greet him when he walked through the sliding doors. His hair jutted out weirdly and Fujioka couldn't shake the impression that he must be an idiot.

"Ah, hi. Sorry for the rudeness, but who are you? And how do you know me?"

Suddenly Touma was there, grabbing the boy by his head and forcing him to bend down, effectively shutting him up.

"This is Makoto, he's a friend of Chiaki's and mine."

"Oh, I see. Uh, nice to meet you."

Touma released the flailing Makoto, casting him aside. He promptly ended up on the floor, before seating himself back under the currently deactivated kotatsu. He turned his face back up, still eager to talk.

"Can you believe it? Chiaki invited me here again! I'm so happy!" He promptly descended into a girlish series of giggles before Touma kicked him in the side.

"Stop acting like that!"

Fujioka agreed. Touma had Makoto outclassed by an order of magnitude in the manliness department. Also, Makoto seemed strangely familiar…

"What's wrong with him?"

"He's just excited. He gets like this sometimes."

Fujioka thought he detected a twinge of annoyance. And then he understood.

_Competition, eh?_

"Don't worry, Touma. I'll be sure to keep him away from her."

"What?"

"The important thing is, uh."

He had difficulty finishing the sentence. Touma waited.

"The thing is, I need to talk to you. Privately"

I can't believe I'm really doing this.

Touma looked briefly shocked, then narrowed his eyes.

"Look, if this is about…the other day, I've got it already, okay? You don't need to talk to me again. How did Kana like those bows anyway?" Touma spoke quickly, clearly trying to change the subject.

"She didn't. That's why I need to talk you. Not about Chiaki."

"Chiaki?" Makoto turned his head to look at them.

"Nothing!" Fujioka dragged Touma out the sliding door with him and nearly ran into Haruka.

"Oh, my, what's the rush here?"

"Explain later!" as he pulled the door to the room closed

He had learned his lesson about having sensitive conversations out in the open where Kana could randomly walk up on them.

Touma pulled her arm away and straightened her collar, feeling--and looking--distinctly uncomfortable. She looked around.

_Seriously? The bathroom?_

"Well, what's the big deal?" she asked.

Fujioka stayed quiet, his momentum gone.

Touma waited.

"Well, the thing is...you see...when I look at you and Chiaki-"

"I thought you said this wasn't about that!"

"Not so loud!" They spoke in loud whispers. "No, this isn't about that. What I want to know is...uh...well...I want to know how you do it."

"Speak up, I can't hear you."

"I want to know how you do it! How you get so much of her attention! I've seen you two, how close you are...I mean, she stood in the same room while you put on her clothes! And the other day...you guys are light-years ahead of where I am! I can't even get Kana to notice me! I've tried everything, including direct confessions, and...I...I just want to know what your secret is!

_God, I'm such a hypocrite._

"I...I sound pathetic, don't I?"

This last phrase was prompted by the fact that Touma had covered his mouth with his right hand and had propped himself with his left onto the doorjamb, quivering with laughter. Upon hearing this, he quickly straightened out and mastered his facial expressions, pulling the collar of his large blue shirt and swallowing.

"No, no, it's understandable. Kana is dense."--_or pretends to be_, she noted silently--It's not your fault at all. Look." He moved forward and put a hand on Fujioka's shoulder.

"Trust me when I say it's not your fault. You're doing fine. I don't have any secrets. Just keep at it"

"Just give me something I can try!"

"Look, it's not like there's some-"

A door slammed. They shut up and listened.

"Oh, Mako-ch-Makoto! Why are you here? Did Chiaki invite you?"

"Yes I did. But forget that. Where's Touma?"

"Fujioka took Touma off to talk or something. They're probably chatting about soccer. You two look hot! Let me get you some cold soda!"

"Hi! Chiaki!"

The sound of a door sliding, and suddenly the voices were too garbled to understand. They breathed a mutual sigh of relief and then Touma said:

"Actually, I have an idea."

"What is it?"

"Jealousy. Girls hate having competition, and Kana won't be any different. Just think about how pissed she gets when someone tries to take her stuff or Mak-someone tries to stop being her toy. So just find some reasonably attractive girl in your class and start lavishing attention on her. It's a sure-fire way of getting Kana's attention."

"Are you serious? And what was that you were saying about-"

"Try it. You'll be surprised."

A crash in the background.

"Get out of here!" Chiaki's voice was loud and clear.

"All right, all right, I get it, I'm going!"

The sound of running.

"And don't ever come back!" The front door slammed.

Touma smiled.


	4. Hidden Truths

_Author's note:_

_It was awkward "zooming out" the focus from Fujioka. I hope it's not too confusing. _

_Update 6/8/09: Minor proofreading, textual revisions for clarification, and inserted a new section to help bridge time better, and remind us all just what age group Fujioka hails from._

Kana was still ignoring him.

He sighed and tucked his head back into his crossed arms, staring off into nothing. It was to be expected, after all. After a solid three days of ignoring his existence and one day of icily ordering him out of her house, there was no reason to expect anything to have changed. Still, it wasn't exactly possible to successfully ignore someone who was already pointedly ignoring you, as Touma's plan called for.

Personally, he doubted both the efficacy of Touma's plan and his own ability to act on it. The deception it called for was contrary to his nature. He was executing it based solely on faith in his adopted younger brother. It was an interesting experience, having to rely on someone whom you had always thought of as relying on you. It made him vaguely uneasy. He reminded himself again that it wasn't, after all, _that_ unusual.

Not for the first time, he wondered what Touma's real brothers were like. Good for nothing, from what he'd heard. Some day he'd have to find them and give them a good talking to.

He pulled himself up from the position he had slouched into and reached for the box next to where his arm had been. In it lay his lunch, hitherto uneaten. His appetite had deserted him the past week, but this time he went mechanically through the motions of eating. He couldn't let it be noticed that her behavior was affecting him. That was part of what Touma said.

_I'm probably a horrible actor._

In the past, he had imagined-no, outright _fantasized_-about the day when Kana would make a lunchbox for him. He had tasted her cooking-it was barely competent, _if_ she kept her "great ideas" under control-but this, of course, was different. It was his personal fantasy. He had even dreamed up various scenarios for it.

She would walk in quietly, nervously. Her twintails would twirl just a bit slower than they usually did-he had dropped the part involving those hair bows after she had stopped wearing them after the first day. The green lining of her uniform would seem unusually cute that day. The people around her would stir, sensing the situation.

_"Fujioka," _she would say, sheepishly, hiding it behind her back.

_"What is it, Minami?" _he would respond, not yet grasping the situation.

_"I...that is...would you..."_ and then she would finally resort to just pulling it out from behind her back and shoving it in his face. Her blushing and averted face would warm his very soul.

_"I...I would love to."_ he would say, unceremoniously dumping the lunch prepared by his mother back into his bag.

It would look hideous, and taste worse, of course. But he wouldn't mind. It would taste heavenly, made by her hands. Their classmates would whisper, or look envious, or roll their eyes, but he wouldn't notice them. It would be just him and her. And when he was done eating, her standing over him the whole time, she would hesitate and then:

_"How...how was it?"_ She would ask, pressing her index fingers together in another gesture that made him want to grab her by the hand and run away with her, then and there.

_"It was delicious!"_ he would say, and then he would smile, and then she would say-

"What the heck are you doing?"

He recoiled in his seat.

"Geez, what a stupid face you had on. It was interfering with my ability to eat. Please don't ever do that again." Kana sat down behind him, and pulled a box out of her bag. It smelled better than his.

He surreptitiously sucked in a bead of drool which had collected at the corner of his mouth. It was progress; she was talking to him!

_I fail at acting, though._

Someone walked up in front of him.

"You okay, man? You've been looking weird for days now. Even your soccer skills are off." His friend's eyes slid off of Fujioka's face and focused instead behind him. He bent down and lowered his voice. "Don't tell me it's-"

Fujioka held up a hand to forestall him.

"No, no I'm fine. It's just this darn flu that's been going around."

"I'm sorry to hear that."

_Maybe I can do something after school, then._

* * *

He spent the rest of the day trying to take notes and otherwise learn, but it was difficult with everything swirling around in his head. He kept turning around to look at Kana, who sat leaning on an elbow, looking immensely bored, twirling her pencil, and wearing the sleepy-eyed expression she seemed to have learned from Chiaki. She never took notes.

It always amazed him that she could do this, and still come out of class with a perfect memory of what had been said. She was more reliable now than his decidedly useless notes. And she didn't fall asleep anymore. Any failures on her part could be patched up by reference to Keiko's impeccable notes. It was, he had long ago admitted to himself, no exaggeration to say that his academic success now rested entirely on constant visits to the Minami household, occasionally with Keiko in tow.

This time, as they sometimes did when his focus waned, his eyes wandered downward. It seemed now that Haruka hadn't been a fluke in that department. It had never been particularly important to him, of course, but as a guy, it was a nice bonus. It was easy to get lost in...

Snickers rang out from those just around them who had noticed what was going on. He immediately turned to face forward, cheeks red. Even the teacher had paused to raise her eyebrow in their general direction, before turning back and continuing.

Whoever had designed their uniforms had a lot to answer for.

The next time he risked a look backwards, she had switched postures, sitting upright in her chair instead of slouching forward.

* * *

The last chime sounded. The end of the day was here.

_I don't have any time left. It's got to be now, but on whom?_

He looked around. Who was a good choice? People were leaving already. He rubbed his chin. He needed someone who didn't have a club right after school...

He saw her.

_Perfect._

"Hey, Riko!" He waved while walking towards her desk.

She jerked backwards in her seat, long hair falling in front of her eyes.

"What...what is it?" She brushed her hair aside, nervously.

"Oh, nothing, I just felt like talking, that's all. How are things?" He leaned back onto the desk next to hers.

"Oh I'm fine. Just fine. Haha."

_No, no! I have to do better than that! He's talking to me! This is my chance!_

"I mean I'm great! I've been doing great! I mean just the other day, I went shopping with Kana and Keiko and I bought this beautiful dress!"

Riko could feel herself starting to sweat.

_No, what the heck am I doing? Why am I talking about clothing? And why mention Kana?_

"I'm sure it looks wonderful on you." Fujioka had difficulty maintaining his smile. It felt so wrong.

"Do you? Thanks." She turned to hide her blushing face.

_I can't believe this! I have to stay calm!_

She couldn't start giggling, no matter how much she felt like it.

"...are you okay?"

"Well, there's this flu going around, you know..."

She didn't notice Fujioka risk a glance backwards at Kana packing her things. She had decided to stand at the window, looking out at the people outside.

_She hasn't even noticed us. _Fujioka lamented.

"H-hi." Keiko slid in quietly from the slide, glancing anxiously to her left.

"Oh, hi, Keiko. Riko was just telling me about that trip you guys took."

"Yes, that-that's nice. Listen, Fujioka."

"Yes?"

"Why don't you call Kana over so we can all talk about it? I think she would appreciate it if you did so." Fujioka had difficulty reading the expression on Keiko's face.

"Er..."

Riko suddenly pushed herself upward and placed herself in front of Keiko, almost touching Keiko's glasses.

"What are you saying, Keiko? How could you say something like that?"

"What-what's wrong with it?"

"Can't you see? She's in one of those moods. You know, the ones where she just stands there like that. You know you can't talk to her when she's like that. How could you!"

_Really?_ questioned Fujioka privately.

"Th-those don't exist, Riko."

"Do they? DO THEY?" Riko was grabbing Keiko's glasses and pressing them into her face the way she had done since middle school. Keiko was backing up as always.

_Damn it, Keiko! What are you trying to do by pulling Kana into this? _raged Riko privately.

_I can't let this get out of hand! What is Fujioka doing?_ thought Keiko.

In the background, unnoticed, Hiroko wrote in her notebook.

Fujioka looked on, extremely perplexed, getting ready to intervene. And then he felt it. A presence he had not felt since...

"Ah, Akira! What are you doing here?" Kana had somehow noticed him and turned greet him. He was conspicuous enough in his _other_-school uniform to draw the attentions of everyone in the room.

"Ah well, since we live close to this school, I figured I'd pay a visit."

"Oh, that's right, you guys get out earlier than we do right?"

"Yeah, but it's not worth it at all. You should see how early we have to get up!"

"Oh I know, Touma complains all the time about you waking her up."

"Does she? I try to be quiet..."

"So what brings you here?"

"Well, it's about that gathering Haruka is planning. Natsuki wants to ask her for suggestions on cooking."

"Couldn't he just call her?"

"Ah well, but for some reason he wants to talk to her in person..."

"Still, I don't see why having you come ask me is logical. I mean...oh I see. I see." She wore an expression of mischievous knowledge.

"What? What do you see?"

"You're here to see Riko, aren't you?"

He took a step back.

"How could you-I don't know what you're-" He turned his head to glance at Riko and he saw it. He saw Fujioka clenching his fists in barely contained rage, while Riko looked on in adoration at his "special expression." Keiko wore her customary overwhelmed expression.

_Oh shit!_

Thinking quickly, he reacted. "That's nonsense, Kana! I'm here to see you, of course!" He enclosed her hands in his.

"What?" She recoiled backwards a step.

That tore it. Fujioka turned, marched over and grabbed him by the arm.

"You. Me. Outside, right now."

Akira pulled his arm away and fled headlong out into the hallway, Fujioka in pursuit. Fujioka easily gained ground until Akira hid himself behind a taller adult. Fujioka barely stopped himself from running into the man.

"Save me, Natsuki!" Akira quivered.

Natsuki spoke.

"I don't know what's going on here. But you-" He pointed at Fujioka. "Stay the hell away from my brother!"

Fujioka pulled back half a step. "Who are you to talk like that?" he said, half expecting to have to immediately run from the clearly stronger man.

"Minami Natsuki. And count yourself lucky that Touma knows you. That's why I'm going to let this slide. Let's go, Akira."

As they turned and walked away, Fujioka made the connection.

_So they're his brothers. This explains so much. I wonder why he knows what I look like._

He sighed.

_Well, now back to what I was doing. Making Kana jeal-_

_No, wait._

_Shit._

* * *

It surprised him greatly, then, when at the end of the day Kana invited him to visit for the first time in nearly a week. He wondered what he had done to cause this change in attitude.

He was in a good mood, then, when he ran into Touma on the way there, just outside the school.

"I'm surprised you bothered to go home and change first."

"Ah, well, I just feel more comfortable when I'm out of that damn uniform, you know."

_I'm not letting you catch me in my uniform again. This time, paranoia pays off._

"Anyway, how'd it go?"

"It worked great! Actually do you have any more ideas?"

"Er...Well, I was thinking about it but I-"

_Didn't think it would actually work and you would want to ask me again._

"Er...you know that gathering Haruka has planned? You are invited, right?"

Touma motioned Fujioka to stop zoning out and cross the street before the light changed.

"Of course. Kana never disinvited me."

"Okay, well bring something amazing."

"What do you mean?"

"Cook something and bring it. Make sure it tastes excellent. This demonstrates both that you care enough to do it and that you _can_ do it. You know how much Kana loves her food. Haruka and Chiaki will be impressed too."

"Not that that's a bad idea, but..."

"But what? Out with it."

"I...I actually can't cook. I've never had to."

"I'm not surprised. Don't worry. I'll have Yoshino and Uchida help me teach you."

"Isn't that sort of...weird?"

"Nah, don't worry. It'll be fine."

Touma grabbed his hand to try and pull him across yet another intersection.

"Geez, what's with you today? Pay attention, why don't you."

"Touma."

"What is it? What's that look?"

"Isn't that your brother across the street?"

Touma turned to observe Natsuki glaring at them from in front of a market across the street. He was wearing a look that meant death.

"Why does he look so pissed?"

"Fujioka, run."

"Why?"

"Just do it!" Touma gave him a shove as emphasis before sprinting forward. Fujioka followed behind.

"Hey, you!" sounded from behind.

"What's going on here, Touma?"

"Run faster!"

Kana raised an eyebrow when they piled into the doorway, panting heavily. Haruka rushed off to prepare the bath.

"R-race," explained Touma. "I won."

_I'm so confused_, thought Fujioka.

_Author's note: For those unfamiliar with the series, Akira is convinced that Riko is Fujioka's girlfriend and that Fujioka is always pissed at him because he's looking at Riko...when in fact he's pissed because Akira is always trying to pretend to be interested in Kana instead._


	5. Derailed by Disgusting

Author's note: Possibly, I went over-the-top here, but I decided to just go with it. Also, at this point I'm convinced Touma knows exactly what she's doing, and that's tormenting Fujioka.

Update 6/18/09: Promised major revision. It was a bad idea to try to force it in the first place with so much to do, and I wasn't happy with what came out. Now that I have more time, I can do what is needed. I ended up making enough additions that I'm going to have to edit chapter 6 to properly resolve some subplots. These were subplots that should have been there to start with but got lost when I tried to rush chapter 5 so much.

_The sun shone brightly in the sky. The air smelled of salt. Waves crashed and seagulls cried overhead._

_"Damn birds." Fujioka looked up, shading his eyes from the sun._

_"Oh, quit complaining."_

_Chiaki continued to adjust his tie. She was almost as tall as him._

_"I better not feel anything wet on my head, that's all I'm saying."_

_"You're just nervous."_

_"Yes, of course I'm nervous. Remind me why you're the one doing this?"_

_"Because I was the closest person standing by who remembered how to tie one of these things. I can't believe you messed it up. What about all those school uniforms over the years? You're such a baka-yaro..."_

_She continued mumbling to herself. Fujioka smiled in memory._

_"Remember that time I tried to visit and accidentally went a floor too high?"_

_"No, no I don't."_

_"That's disappointing. I wanted to ask you what you were trying to show me with that pen."_

_"Oh, that. It's not important right now." She shook her head._

_Touma put his hands on his shoulders. He didn't notice the sudden transformation between persons._

_"Look. Don't be nervous. Wasn't Kana the one who wanted it to be here? Who are you to say no to her? And look at what a nice day it is!" He gestured toward the sky and the beach around them, and tilted his head._

_"Anyway," he said, turning his head back. "You made the commitment to this. Nervousness won't help anything. Now get out there!"_

_Fujioka squinted. Why did Touma look so young, like a teenager? He lost track of that thought when someone cleared his throat next to him._

_He jerked sideways, then quickly recovered his composure. He felt warm hands on his arms. Then he understood._

_How could I possible zone out in my own wedding? And at a moment like this!_

_His eyes darted around, to Haruka with tears in her eyes in the front row, Keiko smiling in the second row, and finally to the face in front of him._

_The look on Kana's face took his breath away. He wished he could take a picture right then there and cherish it forever. His heart pounded in his chest._

_But of course now wasn't the moment for that._

_He leaned in, closing his eyes._

_It was everything he had imagined it would be. Warm, strong, with just a hint of-yes it had everything._

_Then he opened his eyes and looked into her blue, blue-_

_Wait._

_He pulled back._

_"Is something wrong?"_

_Of course something is wrong! Where is Kana? What is Touma doing there? Why was I kissing him? Why does he look female?_

_Indeed, this adult Touma looked most definitely female._

_"Are you okay? Fujioka?" Touma's voice was feminine as well._

_"I-I-"_

_"Was it that amazing, Fujioka?" Kana's voice from behind him, mischievous._

_He clutched his head and collapsed, kneeling to the floor, reeling in vertigo._

_"You should really wake up, you know," said Kana._

_He jerked in his seat._

_"I mean, seriously, how could you fall asleep at a time like this?" He looked up, regaining his composure yet again._

_"That must have been some dream," she said, jerking his right arm to make him sit upright. "Geez, though, do you remember anyone falling asleep at our wedding? Do my sister the same courtesy!"_

_That really was quite a dream. But why couldn't he remember where he was? He looked around._

_Then, a voice from his right. Mako-chan._

_"I'm really glad they finally decided to go ahead and legalize this. I thought it would never happen in a country like this, but I guess times change, huh? I felt so bad for them and look! Don't they make an adorable couple?"_

_He looked up and saw Chiaki and Touma clasping hands, both wearing dresses. The vertigo started to return. He clutched his head._

_"You mean you still haven't figured it out? You're so dense sometimes, I swear!"_

_Kana pulled him by the collar so he had to face her._

_"Listen carefully, Fujioka. Touma is a girl. A girl! And Mako-chan is a boy."_

_"What?"_

_"It's true!"_

_He turned back to look at Mako-chan. Instead, Makoto sat next to him. He couldn't take it any more. He grabbed Makoto by the shoulders to confirm his reality and prepared to scream. _

_"Touma! Touma! What the hell is going on? This is insane!"_

_The people around them stirred. Kana and Makoto were attempting to physically restrain him, yelling at him.__He didn't hear them._

_Touma turned to face him. A distant part of him registered that she looked stunning in her dress. He? She? She had flushed red and was looking very pissed. She opened her mouth, clearly about to yell at him._

_She said:_

"Wake up already! Geez, how many times do I have to tell you?"

He spluttered something incoherent and pulled himself up, then belatedly realized whom it was that was yelling at him. He pressed backward into his bed frame, pushing at the sheets for traction and recoiling at who was in front of him.

"T-Touma! What the hell are you doing here?"

"Have you forgotten already? You assured me you would be awake. Instead I'm told that you're still sleeping. So I asked for permission to come in and wake you up _personally_."

_Which would never have worked had the person at the door known I were a girl_, mused Touma silently.

Fujioka grabbed the alarm clock next to him and pulled it back into position so he could see the time.

12:30 PM. When had he turned it off?

"That damn dream..."

"Yes, you seemed rather into it. Mind telling me what it was about?"

"It was...uh...that is..."

"You were mumbling my name. I'd really like to know." Touma raised an eyebrow questioningly, looking down at him from the corner of his eyes, arms crossed.

"It was-I mean it-ah, nevermind. I can't talk about it." He could feel his cheeks redden.

"Uh-huh. I don't think I want to know anymore. Get yourself changed and I'll be outside."

"You don't have to lea-" but he was already gone.

Change into jeans, put on a shirt he didn't mind getting dirty, and migrate to the bathroom for his daily victuals. Hmm...no need to shave today.

By the time he finished it was already one. He found Touma chatting with Uchida and Yoshino, the three of them gleefully consuming his family's food in the front room.

"You brought them with you?!" He did his best to convey his dismay.

"Yeah. We had stuff to do in the morning. Is there a problem with that?" Touma popped a slice of tangerine in his mouth and gestured for Fujioka to sit down and eat the light lunch set on the table.

"We were shopping! I found the cutest stuffed horsey! Let me show you!" With that, Uchida turned to rummage through some bags stacked behind her. Her pigtails whipped around her pink shirt. Lately she had been letting them grow out a bit longer, a lá Kana. Yoshino leaned back, stretching her blue sweater, and watched her carefully. Once again, he was reminded that they were growing older, after all. He looked away.

Sitting down, Fujioka tried to whisper only to Touma.

"You brought two girls to my house, in front of my _parents_-"

"Fujioka, calm down. You're overreacting. Don't tell you've never brought Kana or Keiko here? You guys had study sessions and stuff, right? It _is_ possible to be friends with girls, you know." Another slice of tangerine went in his mouth.

"You don't know my parents-"

"Your mom seemed fine with it. Especially after I explained why we're here."

"You _explained_-!"

He sunk his head to the table in despair.

"We had a nice long talk," Touma continued. Unseen by Fujioka, her face slowly spread into a barely contained grin. "Did you know? She really likes Kana. Says she's pretty and smart and full of energy. She was really impressed by her dragging you through entrance exams. She approves of our goals. She even thinks you guys make _such_ a cute couple! Don't we agree, guys?"

Yoshino, the one paying attention, nodded brightly. Fujioka's only response was to groan softly on the table.

It wasn't just the supremely embarrassing topic, though that was more than enough. It was the way Touma's voice had gone up the registers, deliberately mocking. After that dream, the effect was disturbingly feminine. He even felt a slight twinge of nausea.

Touma pointed at Fujioka's food, still obviously enjoying the moment.

"If you're not going to eat that, can I have it?"

"Found it!" Uchida turned and thrust an object out across the table in triumph. It was indeed a stuffed horse, with a carrot in its mouth.

"Don't you already have like seven of those?" asked Touma.

She pulled it back and pouted.

"So? There's nothing wrong with getting more! It's better than you and your collection of oversized shirts!"

"You know very well why I wear oversized shirts! You're not supposed to talk about that!"

"Hehe~"

Fujioka sighed, getting up, and reached up to grab his rice ball out of Touma's hands before he could eat it.

He would probably need his energy.

* * *

They gave his mother fond farewells. Blessedly, she didn't say a word about where they were going, not even to ask. His carefully prepared lie was worthless now anyway, and the light in her eyes made it clear he would never hear the end of this.

A short walk later, they entered the light rail station, where he wordlessly paid the fares for everyone except Yoshino, who outright refused to accept it. On the train itself, he deliberately tried to convey the impression that he was the older sibling taking his younger brother and friends out, instead of the high-schooler who for some reason cultivated friendships with younger girls. It was stupid to care about perception so much, but he couldn't help it. They alighted in a high-end area which Touma claimed had all the best supermarkets.

"I buy a lot of stuff for my family, so I know what I'm doing," Touma explained. "But Natsuki's the one who does the cooking."

They ended up taking their time, stopping at an ice cream shop for rounds of sundaes, Touma and Uchida ruthlessly exploiting his generosity. This time he insisted on paying for Yoshino, despite her protests. He knew his responsibilities. Privately, he mourned his finances, but he'd worry about that later.

They also made him carry all the bags from their previous trips. He bore it in silence, occasionally looking into the bags out of curiosity. He pondered over why a group of fighting and other games clearly belonging to Touma had been packed together with skirts and-

He looked away. It wouldn't do to stare at _those_. They were probably just going to separate it later, even if it did look like the three separate bags belonged to three different people.

The moment they stepped into the supermarket Touma had chosen, Touma launched into an obviously prepared lecture, oblivious to the glances of accidental eavesdroppers.

"So, the first step to being a good cook is getting good ingredients. Bad ingredients can ruin a meal, and good ingredients can take a surprising amount of abuse," he said as they shuffled to the produce section. "Of course, you should still remember that for a cook, skill comes first. Passion and good ingredients come only after that."

Touma reached into one of the bins.

"Do you know how to select vegetables?" Touma stuck his hand in Fujioka's face before opening it to reveal a cherry tomato.

He could feel the stares of other supermarket patrons on his neck. The bags he was carrying dragged at his arms.

"No. No, I don't."

"Okay, that's fine. That's where we'll start, then." He tossed the tomato in the air and caught it. "First, you-Uchida! What are you doing?" Touma snapped his head around to look at Uchida as a pile of onions collapsed onto the floor.

"I'm sorry! I just tried to grab one and then it just fell..."

"There, there, it's okay. It's okay. They're fine, see?" soothed Yoshino, bending down and picking one up for inspection. "Just help me pick them up."

Fujioka could tell this would be a long day.

Right after they finished choosing the onions, squash, and assorted greens decreed necessary, Touma was kind enough to relieve the overburdened Fujioka of one of his bags, the one containing the games. It was then that Uchida's eyes flew open and she suddenly said:

"Oh! Why don't we just get a shopping cart and put the bags in there? It'd be so much easier!"

"Oh, that's right," said Touma. "Wow, I can't believe I forgot something like that!"

"Yeah, sorry about that, Fujioka," apologized Yoshino. "But you're okay, right?"

He had to concede that, however silly it was to forget something like that, if anyone should have remembered it should have been him, the pack mule.

Uchida insisted on pushing the cart, for reasons that became apparent the first time she pushed it forward and jumped onto the back bar to ride it. It was Yoshino who chased her down and forced her to get off before she crashed into anything.

"Geez, you guys are just like my parents!" she said as she sulkily pushed the cart forward, this time in the conventional manner.

They made their way to the seasoning and sauce aisle.

"We need to buy sauces?" asked Fujioka

"We don't. However"--Touma reached over and pulled a small canister of soy sauce off the shelf--"It's important that you know about them. For instance, do you know the differences in use between the different varieties of soy sauce?"

Touma turned his head to glare at Uchida, who sheepishly pulled her hand back from a stack of cans she had been reaching for.

"There are varieties of soy sauce?" asked Fujioka.

Touma sighed. It would be a long day

* * *

It was one of the phenomena of modern life. He had worn a thick jacket for the cold, and it had served him admirably when they had been outdoors, but now, on the heated train, it was making him sweat.

To his right, Uchida and Yoshino talked in quiet tones. He turned to face Touma.

"So what was with your brother the other day? His name is Natsuki, right?"

"Oh, yeah. He was, uh, well, he's very protective. It took me an hour to calm him down when I got home last time. That's how protective he is."

Briefly, Touma relived that conversation in her head, shuddering a little. She didn't want to go through that again. She dreaded now the day she would have to bring home an actual boyfriend.

_If indeed I ever do._

She shoved that thought, with its assorted ramifications, out of mind.

"That's overdoing it, isn't it?" Fujioka was saying.

"Well, he seems to...that is, he doesn't much like it when I spend time with people he doesn't know. It should be fine now."

"That's still pretty-"

"Yeah, well, tell _him_ that. My original idea was to have him teach you to cook, but that's not going to work now."

_Plus, way too high a chance of my secret being revealed. Better to do it with people who know what not to say. And Uchida's mother…_

There was a long moment of silence before Fujioka spoke.

"So will you tell me where we're going, then? I thought for sure we were headed to your place, but this is the wrong direction entirely."

"No, we're going to Yoshino's. She has the largest kitchen and she'll be the one doing the teaching. She's recently started developing cooking as sort of a hobby, I guess."

"I see..."

"Oh, that's right!" Yoshino exclaimed. "I should call ahead to tell them we'll be arriving."

She whipped out her cell phone and placed the call. Uchida's eyes narrowed in envy.

"My brother says I'll get one when I enter high school," mused Touma. "It's the same for you, right Uchida?" Touma leaned forward so he could make the necessary eye contact.

"Yeah. It is."

From Uchida's expression and aggrieved tone of voice it was apparent she was not happy with the situation. Given what he knew about Uchida, Fujioka decided that her parents were wise to deny her something so fragile and highly expensive.

"You have one too, don't you, Fujioka?" asked Touma.

"Oh yeah, I do." He reached into his pocket, trying not to nudge Touma or Uchida around him, and pulled it out for display.

"It's practically a waste. The only one who ever calls me is Kana when she wants me to run some errand for her. Or my parents to badger me about something."

Still, he realized, being able to receive extra calls from Kana was more than worth it.

"You should give me your number. It will make things easier and stuff," Touma said.

"Oh sure, uh, do any of you have a pen?"

Yoshino had a pen, and he had just finished jotting it down on the outside of the paper bag Touma was carrying when the train stopped and the three of them got up en masse.

"We're here," Touma said simply.

He followed the rest of them to the curbside, where they waited.

He was expecting a bus, given the fact that they were standing near a prominent bus stop, so he was surprised when, a few minutes later, a black car with darkened windows drove up and stopped. He had just begun to admire the high-end model when suddenly the trunk popped open and the others moved to pile their bags into it. He moved to follow suit, when suddenly the driver jumped out the right side and ran to the back.

"Young miss, I keep telling you to let me deal with the bags!"

The driver was wearing a formal uniform and gloves—gloves!

It was then Fujioka began to understand.

He grabbed the bags out of Fujioka's hand and began to stack the trunk.

"I told you it wasn't necessary…" responded Yoshino.

"I would be neglecting my duties if I allowed you and your guests to load the trunk," he said formally. "And I apologize for being dilatory."

Yoshino sighed.

"Go ahead and get in," he continued. Someone will have to take the front seat, I'm afraid."

Fujioka volunteered since, after all, it made sense to seat the three of them together.

The car exited the station and began to chart a path up into the hills.

"Where I live is way too far from the station to walk, and the buses don't go there," explained Yoshino, faintly embarrassed.

In the heated car, Fujioka's jacket was beginning to make him sweat again, so he took it off and placed it on the floor, making a mental note not to forget it. He leaned back on the seat and considering sleeping for a while to alleviate his tiredness. Behind him, the other three talked in low tones. He watched the world outside pass by, not sure whether to be glad that the front seat didn't have darkened windows. The quality and size of the residences began to slowly increase, and they seemed to pass a gate of some sort…

Just as he began the descent into sleep, the world spinning away from him, the driver announced they were almost there, forcing him to stretch to wake himself. His eyes then flew open wide at the sight of the behemoth they were approaching. "Huge" did not even begin to describe it. Fujioka turned toward the back, unable momentarily to contain his astonishment.

In answer to his unasked question, Yoshino rubbed the back of her head and looked away in embarrassment, saying:

"Yeah…I live there."

"I told you she would have the largest kitchen," Touma said

The car slowed to a stop inside a large carport. They got out and watched as the chauffeur opened the trunk from the back and grabbed the food, running off with it into the building. They trailed behind, Yoshino pausing to grab her bag of purchased clothing—"He forgot," she noted—and walked to the kitchen.

Fujioka expected a long walk but the kitchen wasn't much distance, actually, and neither was anything else, it seemed. When Yoshino ran by herself up a spiral staircase to place her new clothes carefully in her room, Fujioka could see that it wasn't far away at all; in fact it was the first room at the top. The rooms they did see were huge, but what he was seeing didn't match his initial impression of the house at all.

They sat down in chairs in the living area to wait, munching on snacks conveniently placed on the small table in front of them. He tried to ask Touma quietly about the size of the house, but Touma didn't oblige him by answering in the same low tone of voice.

"Ah Fujioka, well, she lives here alone, with only a few servants," he said loudly. "The place is actually huge, as I'm sure you've noticed. Even if you brought a giant family to live here, it would be impossible to use all the rooms. That doesn't mean she couldn't keep the whole house open if she wanted, but she thinks it's pretty stupid. So only this region of the house is actually kept open."

Touma leaned back into her plush chair, socked feet on the footrest.

Looking around, Fujioka realized it made quite a bit of sense. The living area they were in, with its giant screen TV and gaming systems stacked in the corner, was pretty obviously decorated according to the sensibilities of a young girl. There was nothing wrong with brightly colored chairs, heart-shaped pillows, and flowery lamps, but they combined to give the distinct impression of being in a girl's room. Thinking back, the hallways and rooms they had passed—those not impassively barred by closed doors—were similar. The whole place was, in fact, quite similar in general taste to the Minami household, but the clear product of much greater sums of money, judging by the silk throw pillows and occasional gold trimming.

Seeing him looking, Uchida brightened and said, "Like it? I helped her pick out the furniture and stuff!"

"I can believe that," he answered simply. "It's pretty, I guess."

Uchida seemed pleased by the compliment, but he leaned back in his chair, digesting the implications of what Touma had said.

_She lives alone? At her age? Where are her parents?_

Then again, he realized, he had no idea where Touma or Kana's parents were either. He had never asked. Perhaps it explained why they got along together so well.

Thinking of Touma, he turned his head to look at him. Touma had his eyes closed, seemingly asleep already.

Wait, why was Touma wearing girl's socks? Or they certainly seemed like it, given the material and the pink lining. In fact, they looked pretty similar to the socks he had seen packed with the feminine attire and Touma's games….

"Touma!" exclaimed Uchida suddenly.

"What is it?" he murmured, not opening his eyes.

Uchida jumped out of her chair, walked the couple of steps over to Touma, and poked him in the head, leaning over. Fujioka might have been imagining things, but it seemed almost like Uchida was whispering something, give how close she leaned to Touma's ear.

"What are you doing wearing my socks? Why do you even have my socks?" she said out loud.

"Huh? What?" Touma stirred suddenly, looking at his feet.

"You idiot! You must have grabbed my socks by mistake last time we went shopping! Can't you even tell that these are girl's socks?" She pointed at Touma's feet.

"Oh, sorry, sorry. I must not have been paying attention. I'll give it back to you later, but my feet are cold…"

"Humph!" responded Uchida. "How stupid are you? Don't you help to do the laundry or something?"

"Geez! It was a mistake, alright? I don't look that carefully at the stuff I put on! I'm not a girl! I said I'll give it back to you!"

"Yeah, yeah. Just don't do it again," Uchida responded, sitting back down.

_Oh, that makes sense_, Fujioka thought, leaning back again.

"I'm back," Yoshino declared, as Fujioka opened his eyes in response to the sound of her approaching footsteps.

* * *

After that, it was nonstop work. Yoshino dove into one of the cabinets and pulled out a matching set of four pink aprons, all properly-sized. As he was tying his, he reflected that it was a good thing none of his friends could see him.

Touma didn't seem self-conscious at all. After Uchida finished admiring herself in her pretty apron, the two of them promptly returned to the other room to play Touma's newly purchased games on Yoshino's television, excusing themselves with the statements that they had neither any real cooking skills nor any interest in learning. It was aggravating having to sweat over a hot stove to the tune of "Sensei!" and "Ninomiya-kun!" Fujioka felt as if he were close to some revelation.

Revelations in cooking, however, were few and far between. Yoshino did one demonstration round for him to watch—they consumed the products—and the rest of the day was spent painstakingly cooking basic dishes. It was initially distracting having to work in such close proximity to Yoshino, with her hand on his showing him how to chop. The perfume she had recently taken to wearing contributed to clouding his thoughts. The distraction wore off quickly, though. She wasn't Kana, after all.

It was late in the night—and after a suspiciously questioning phone call from his parents—before he was able to lurch out of the kitchen, smelling of burnt food and Yoshino's perfume. Uchida was already asleep on the floor, mumbling something about princes and turning occasionally. Touma was still hard at work beating a boss in his game, but he turned off the system on their appearance with a plate of food.

Perhaps the tiredness was getting to him. Maybe the perfume was still affecting him. Maybe his mad dream had burned itself onto his mind. But as Touma stretched himself before getting up, he noticed something truly incongruous.

The nausea returned in greater force. He was obliged to put a hand on one of the plush chairs for support.

"Are you okay, Fujioka?" asked Yoshino.

"Yeah, you don't look so good," said Touma, walking up.

"No, no, I'm fine," he insisted, straightening up. Behind Touma, Uchida sat up, rubbing her eyes.

"Touma," he began.

"Yeah?"

"I don't really know how to say this but…it was a really bad idea to stop those early morning training sessions. That chest fat is worse than ever!"

The backhand, when it came a few seconds later, was truly painful.

-------------------

Much later, lying in his bed, he thought back.

He rubbed his cheek, which still smarted.

When Touma had gotten off the train, he had taken the bag with him. Nothing had been taken out. Perhaps he had a female cousin who was visiting and he had to shop for her for some reason but…

Cued by his dream, he was starting to think something truly insane.

* * *

The day of the party was here.

He wasn't exactly sure what this gathering was for, but according to Haruka, it was fully spontaneous.

Regardless of its purpose, he was ready.

Walking along the railing overlooking the evening landscape, he regarded his box filled with cooked ham proudly. Simple, but tasty, and he had tried it himself to make sure.

He raised his hand to turn the doorknob and almost fell over when the door opened on its own.

"Oh. It's you."

Natsuki looked down at him. Fujioka didn't like the look he was receiving.

"Well, come on in."

Fujioka chuckled nervously, straightening himself up, and walked through the door.

It seemed that only he and Natsuki had brought food. Uchida and Yoshino had already promised to bring nothing, so this was partly planned. The two of them had already disappeared into the bedrooms with Chiaki and Makoto. He had assumed Touma would go with them, but for some reason he was sitting at the kotatsu, to the left of Fujioka, looking strangely nervous. Natsuki sat at his right.

Kana strode in from the kitchen, saying something about Riko to Akira. He glared at Akira until he hid himself behind Natsuki. Natsuki glared back at him. Kana sat down across from him. Excellent.

For his part, Natsuki seemed to be mostly ignoring him, which was an improvement from last time. But who was that guy sitting in front of the TV, staring at Fujioka with daggers in his eyes?

"Touma," he whispered, "who is that?"

"That's-oh, that's my oldest brother, Haruo. He's, uh, weird too."

Fujioka pitied Touma.

"Why aren't you back there with Chiaki?"

"I have to be on guard out here."

"Against what?"

Touma didn't answer.

Suddenly, the sliding door slid open.

Haruka strode in, holding up a pink picture album.

"I found it!"

"Oh, good," responded Natsuki in his standard monotonous fashion, reaching behind his back.

"What pictures are these?" mumbled Kana through a meat bun she had pilfered from the kitchen.

"Childhood pictures of you guys! Natsuki and I agreed to show each other."

Touma dropped the tangerine he had been holding. The meat bun fell out of Kana's mouth.

Faster than anyone could respond, they had both dived across the table at their respective targets and confiscated them.

"Kana!"

"You can't show them these! It is imperative that no one see these pictures!" Touma struggled with Natsuki trying to pull it out of his hands.

"That's right! They're private!"

Kana ran out the door with Haruka chasing behind.

Natsuki and Touma continued to struggle on the floor.

"It's not like they're even embarrassing! They're perfectly normal pictures!"

"You don't understand!"

Fujioka stood up.

"That's enough. If Touma doesn't want to show them, you shouldn't use force."

Natsuki looked at him and exhaled, conceding, then got up.

"You're right. Touma's old enough for it to matter." They sat back down. Touma clutched the album to his chest, cheeks tinged with embarrassment.

In the background, he heard shouts of "Kana!" and "What are you doing, Baka-yaro!"

_I wouldn't mind seeing Kana's childhood pictures. I bet they're cute! I wish I had met her earlier. Then we could be childhood friends. Then-_

"I wonder what you're thinking about."

He jerked his head back from the surprisingly close face of Maki. Where had she come from?

"N-Nothing."

"Of course not. And it has nothing to do with this ham. I advise you to go back there"--she indicated with her thumb--"and help Haruka fight for those pictures. After all, you want to see them too."

"I-I don't know what you're talking about."

"And you!" she pointed at Natsuki. "I'm watching you! I better not see any suspicious moves out of you!"

"Humph. I don't know what you're talking about." He turned his head condescendingly.

"Maki~" Hayami stuck her head out past the kitchen door. Her hand made a come-hither gesture.

"What?"

"Atsuko needs help opening this can of tomato sauce. She can't get the can opener to work."

"Why can't you do it?"

"Just come here already!"

With a final glare at Natsuki, she departed,

Disappointingly, Haruka ended up relenting. Whatever Kana was trying to hide would remain a secret. He finished downing his cup of tea, then got up to use the bathroom.

He found Uchida and Yoshino whispering to each other in front of the bathroom.

"I'm surprised she invited him over. Was she mad that Mako-chan wasn't here?"

"Nah, Kana told her she made some sort of excuse. My question is: what happened to Fujioka?" asked Uchida.

"He's right behind you."

"No, you know that's not what I mean! I mean-eep!"

They moved aside so he could reach the door.

He wondered when they would start eating.

* * *

Kana had insisted that they try his food first "so they could properly grade it." Most likely, she just wanted to make sure it wasn't any better than her own poisonously creative culinary creations.

The moment had finally arrived. Everyone was gathered around the table--mostly standing. It was a small table. The lid came off. Her chopsticks reached into the box... He bit his lip nervously.

The doorbell chimed. He exhaled.

Haruka got up to get the door. They waited.

"Geez, why can't we just eat already? Why are we being so dramatic-"

Makoto was cut off as a stuffed bear flew into his face. He fell to the floor.

Again silence. Haruka returned. They looked at her expectantly.

"It was no one. No one at all. Just a package delivery. Excuse me, I need to go to the kitchen..."

She sidled sideways quickly towards the kitchen, obviously trying to hide something behind her back. It was Hayami who jumped up and stopped her.

"Oh, what's this~"

Haruka hung back, defeated.

"Hmm, a card. 'To Haruka…from a Secret Admirer'"

Quiet gasps from around the table

"…And in the box is food!"

She placed it on the table.

"There's a whole cart of these outside the door," Haruka admitted. "I might as well go get them."

"Filet Mignon!"

"Meatballs in truffle sauce?"

"Matsutake!"

"Stuffed Lobster?"

"Look at this cake!"

"I for one cannot believe he actually got up the courage to do this!" mused Hayami.

"Who?!" asked Haruka.

"I, of course, am speaking hypothetically."

"Wow, this is delicious!"

"Wait, it might be poisoned!" That was Touma.

"I don't feel poisoned..."

On the ground was moved Fujioka's box, forgotten.

* * *

In the end, Maki was the only one to remember to try anything Natsuki or Fujioka had made, perhaps moved by sympathy. Everyone else was too stuffed. Fujioka's ham was "in comparison to the previous...pretty bad." He was surprised to see that Natsuki was wearing the same expression he was, only with the slightest twinge of...anger. He wondered what was going on there.

"Hey Fujioka!"

"Minami?" He instantly perked up, his heart rate picking up. Kana had walked into the living area with Yoshino and Uchida.

"I want to show you something. Follow me!"

"Sure. Let me just get up…"

He was careful not to bang his knees on the table and embarrass himself.

"You wouldn't happen to know what happened to Touma? I can't find Touma anywhere!"

Fujioka thought carefully. Touma had been missing for a while, he realized.

"No, I have no idea where Touma is."

"How disappointing. Well, Touma will just have to miss it, then."

They followed her the few meters to the front door.

"Where are we going, Kana?" asked Yoshino.

"Nowhere. I just want to show you-"

She opened the door to discover Touma and Chiaki jumping guiltily away from each other.

They quickly adjusted themselves so they were leaning over the railing, with Chiaki pointing.

"Ah, and there's the curry fairy."

"The what?"

"Nevermind. Anyway, I'm here to show you-"

"Keeping secrets, eh?" interjected Kana, wearing her "you have set me up perfectly" look. Uchida and Yoshino were in a furiously-whispered conversation with each other.

"No! What are you saying, baka-yaro? I-I'm just here to show Touma that flashing advertisement train that goes by every day."

Fujioka had never seen Chiaki flustered.

"Of course you were. Of course you were," Kana responded.

Touma wouldn't make eye contact with Fujioka.

_Oh, of course_, Fujioka realized. _Of course it was crazy. No way Touma is…unless…_

No, it didn't prove anything, he decided.

"Oh, damn it we missed it! See what you've done, Kana?" said Chiaki

"What I've done!"

Kana wasn't going to push it, and neither was he. He couldn't berate Touma anymore. How could he? It no longer made any sense.

* * *

He left a while after Touma's family, alone, though Yoshino offered to have her chauffeur drive him with her and Uchida.

He moped silently along the path in front of the Minami's complex, unhappy. What a waste of effort it had all been. The trees along the edge of the street cast ghostly shadows under the streetlights. No cars passed him. It suited his mood.

His cell phone rang, making him jump. He picked up.

"Hey, it's Touma. I just got home. I, uh, well I guess I wanted to say that I'm sorry for earlier."

"It's okay. Look, in the future if Chiaki tries to-"

"No. I'm not talking about that."

"Then-oh."

A pause.

"Anyway, how was I supposed to know some sort of secret admirer would get involved? Really! It's like some sort of bad manga." Touma said.

"You didn't even eat any of my food!"

"Self-defense. Anyway, look. I'll think of something else. Talk to me later, okay?"

Sigh..."Okay. Promise me you'll think about how I told you to behave around Chiaki."

"I will."

Touma hung up.

There was someone close to him, he suddenly noticed. Fujioka quickened his pace, keeping a wary eye on the man, who was standing in the chiaroscuro of a tree's shadow.

_Good God, is that man stripping?_

_He _is_ stripping!_

Fujioka got as close as he could to running without actually running, and headed home.

_Author's note: Gotta love them cameos. For those who are wondering, it actually does say in the notes to the first manga volume that Yoshino "appears to be rich." But this fact is never utilized._

_Second note: I don't intend the dream to be prophetic at all, merely a precognitive sampling of the future, just like happens in reality. It also contains an upwelling from Fujioka's subconscious, which has already realized large elements of the truth and is desperately trying to inform him of it. There is only a minor hint of clairvoyance, which I couldn't resist, but it could easily be nothing at all._


	6. Shadows of the Past

_Author's notes: Sigh. Chapter inflation strikes again. This chapter is huge but, I hope, deservedly so._

_ This chapter is the farthest I depart from established canon. I worried at that, and then I told myself, it's a fanfic. What the hell are you worried about? I hope my writing skills are up to par, and thanks for reading._

_Update May 30 2009: Ugh. It's what happens when you type stuff at 1 AM and are feeling sleepy. You forget about that thing you were planning to do all along, that grand allusion and giant flashback which would tie all the chapters together. Bleh. Well anyway, much better explicated final scene._

_Update 6/25/2009: Now with extra drama! I decided I couldn't leave the Touma situation as it was, so I gave it a resolution of sorts. It just wasn't plausible for Fujioka to be that unperceptive._

_With this update, I'm essentially done, except I'm weighing whether or not to add a chapter 7 omake to make up for the lack of Haruka time. Of course, the anime/manga suffer from the same problem..._

_Update 3/21/2011: Just to show I'm still paying attention. From the perspective of a year and a half later, I'm no longer satisfied with the descriptive quality of this story. I'm ambivalent whether to rewrite this first or move on to a Haruka story...but we'll see. As for why I'm here: Minor plothole correction, as always.  
_

* * *

Fujioka looked out the window, watching the late autumn landscape pass by. The trees were mostly bare and the ground was covered in multicolor leaves, except in various places where someone had made the effort to clear them away.

A finger prodded his head, jostling his field of view.

"Fujioka, it's your turn. Go already. "

He turned back to the Othello board, resting in the middle of the van on its improvised stand, a tray and a small cooler box. The back seats had been rearranged to face each other, a flexibility that was a minor stroke of genius, though not of safety planning, on the part of the car designers.

"I'm thinking, Minami," he said, avoiding looking at her face, then jerking his head upward when he realized where he _was_ looking. "I want to win."

"You weren't even looking at the board!" protested Uchida, at his right.

"Have some patience, Uchida. It's a long drive."

"But you guys take forever~"

"It is precisely because we take forever that we're the finalists in this tournament," Touma rebutted from the opposite side. "I'm not the same Touma who used to lose so ignominiously to Kana!"

After a brief pause, Kana went back to studying the board. Uchida pouted, then turned towards Yoshino to pester her to give her some of the shrimp chips that Yoshino was steadfastly withholding.

"But why not? Yoshino…."

"I told you. It's for your own good. You should have more discipline."

"You're not my mother! I can get fat if I want to!"

"I thought you wanted a prince? I'm just making sure you get what you want. And it starts with some food discipline."

Uchida stared at her, eyes glaring and mouth frowning. Yoshino looked back at her coolly, the forbidden fruit ensconced behind her back, next to Chiaki.

Suddenly, Uchida attacked.

Fujioka sighed as the two of them fell into bickering and fighting, Keiko and Riko on the other side trying to calm them down. He was aware that Uchida had qualities that would—and probably did—make her irresistible to a major subset of the boys at her school. Right now though, those qualities weren't feeling particularly endearing to him—most likely a good thing.

Kana looked up.

"Oh, just give it to her, Yoshino. They _are _amazingly good."

"It's-it's not worth it!" replied Yoshino, wresting with Uchida.

"Remind me again how we ended up bringing so many people," Fujioka asked Touma.

Across the board, Touma frowned, his eyes still on the board, before saying:

"Well, after Yoshino agreed to my idea, she said we might as well bring whomever we wanted. I told her that'd be abusing hospitality, but how was I supposed to know she would start inviting people herself? Did you know she even had Riko's cell phone number? When did she get it, I wonder…"

"If you didn't, how would I? Anyway, wasn't it nice of Yoshino to let us use her family's country villa?" said Fujioka, his eyes sliding right towards Yoshino to see if she had noticed the indirect compliment. Instead, she was still struggling with Uchida, her palm jammed squarely in Uchida's face, trying to fend her off as Uchida reached for the bag in Yoshino's other hand.

"The two of you settle down back there!" barked Kumada, from the passenger side seat, turning her head around her seat. Yes, Yoshino had even managed to convince their elementary school nurse to join them. While he was pretty sure what this implied about Kumada's social life—that is, she had none—he continued to be at a loss as to Yoshino's inscrutable motives.

"But-!"

"Now, now, it's okay," Kumada said soothingly. "We'll have dinner when we get there."

Uchida sat back down and sulked.

Kana's eyes lit up suddenly.

"You guys should have a duel for it! Play another game after Touma and Fujioka are done!"

"You really like this game, don't you Kana?" asked Yoshino.

"So what? It's a good game-"

"Too bad you suck at it," interjected Riko, to which Kana raised a fist in silent reply.

"-So how about it, Uchida?" finished Kana, not having missed a beat.

"Sure!"

"Nah, not a good idea." said Kumada, "You shouldn't eat any. I was the one who took your weight in primary school, remember? Yoshino-chan is right."

Uchida jumped up—or the closest to it that was possible in the crowded van.

"You, you-witch! What are you even doing here?"

Kumada stuck her tongue out at her and the two of them proceeded to argue

Fujioka sighed again. Just as he had expected. This "Kumada" was thoroughly unreliable. What was Yoshino thinking?

Touma cleared his throat.

"Anyway, thanks, Yoshino." He made eye contact with her, then turned back to Fujioka. "See this why they always have a rich girl in manga. Because she's a girl, she's nice enough to be helpful and give you stuff. And because she's rich, she's capable of enabling any plot device the author requires. It makes things easier and is a catalyst for things. Just like now." He said it while smiling at Yoshino to make it clear it was intended as a strange compliment. She smiled back.

"…wait a minute, Touma. Just where are you getting your ideas anyway? I mean that thing about jealousy…"

His eyes slid toward Kana, whom everyone-except, strangely, Riko -had insisted on seating across from him. She was staring out the window now, probably still miffed at her close-fought loss to Uchida in round one, and now ignoring the rest of them. Her streak of ignominy at Othello continued unabated. For her part, Riko sat at Touma's other side, talking with Keiko—he didn't notice the nervous glances Riko stole in his direction. Chiaki sat looking out the far window, by her own declaration too skilled to participate in their lowly Othello tournament. She had been quiet the entire trip, not even bothering to insult Kana in her usual fashion. As she continued to look out at the picturesque countryside, he wondered, not for the first time, just what was going on underneath that voluminous hair.

Touma too had glanced at Kana but took some time in giving an answer.

"It's, uh, classified."

"What kind of answer is that?"

Touma shrugged.

"Would you at least tell me why your brother insisted on coming?"

Natsuki hadn't been invited, but had suddenly decided that he needed to chaperone Touma on this trip. It made enough sense, considering it was an overnight trip to a distant location, but Natsuki had decided to make up for his rudeness by offering to drive the overflow passengers, three in all, in _that_ Minami family's newly acquired vehicle. That included Haruka, Hayami—another self-invitee, only this time shameless—and Mako-chan, who had developed an unexpected rapport with Hayami and had insisted upon traveling with her. He wondered what they had in common.

Maki and Atsuko unexpectedly had other plans. Makoto was apparently sick.

Yes, Yoshino had invited _everyone_, or near enough to it, and they had all shown up. What was she trying to do?

"…I'd rather not say," Touma replied.

"But-"

"Just go already!" exclaimed Uchida. "Come on!" Their argument had ended, it seemed, and Kumada was back to talking animatedly with Takeru, the driver. Clearly, Uchida wanted those chips.

_Fine._

Fujioka made the move he had been thinking about, flipping a couple of Touma's black pieces.

"Oh, great move!" exclaimed Kana.

Fujioka was briefly warmed, then observed Touma's sudden malicious smile. He reexamined his move.

"Oh no."

"Oh yes," responded Touma in counterpoint.

"What? What is it?" asked Kana.

Well, second place was okay too.

"Wake up guys! We're almost there!"

Kumada's voice drifted into his consciousness, shattering the cobwebs of a dream about… well, about something. It had been a good dream, if he recalled correctly. And something to do with a smell. But he couldn't remember.

They had all tired out eventually. He was one of the last to fall asleep, with Uchida, Yoshino and Chiaki having formed a row of collapsed dominoes onto his right shoulder, one sleeping on the other. Touma had collapsed onto Riko in a fairly…unusual position involving her chest, falling instantly asleep upon contact. Riko seemed okay with it though, running her hands through his hair and making comments about it to Keiko. He had no idea what kind of personal magnetism Touma radiated that let him get away with this kind of stuff.

Maybe it wasn't personality at all.

Riko herself ended up leaning onto Keiko's shoulder. He had been vaguely disturbed by the way she seemed to be repeating his name while asleep, but it probably didn't mean anything. Keiko, however, hadn't seemed tired at all, opening a book she had brought with her and beginning to read fervently. Chiaki had then snapped shut her own book and read Keiko's from the top. They shared a quiet conversation before Chiaki returned to her book and eventually dropped off to sleep as well. His last memory before falling asleep had been Keiko with a determined frown staring at her book, and Kana staring at him with wide, still-energetic eyes, probably disappointed that the rest of them couldn't maintain her level of energy.

He moved his right shoulder to jostle Uchida awake, starting the necessary chain reaction of jostles, then opened his eyes.

_Ah, so that's what it was._

His first reaction was to reflect on whether it was even possible to fall asleep in such a position. Kana had chosen to fall asleep diagonally, with her head on the window, one leg on Touma's lap and her other foot squarely between Fujioka's legs. Drool had pooled at the corner of her mouth. Both her legs and feet twitched periodically, as if involved in a dream about running. Having long ago abandoned shoes for the long trip, her feet and socks carried a strong aroma. That explained the dreams.

His second reaction was to note where exactly her twitching foot had landed.

"Erk!"

He pushed himself backwards even though, of course, he had nowhere to go. Peripherally, he noticed that Keiko had opted to hold her book much higher than she normally did, so that it covered her eyes. She dropped it a fraction and said:

"I didn't want to wake her…"

The leg pulled itself away as Kana stretched herself awake.

"So, Kana," said Riko, poking her head in from the right. "What kind of dream was that?"

Kana was momentarily taken aback by the sudden question, then responded:

"Why do you want to know? Go back to flaunting your chest by letting people sleep on it!"

"Yeah, that's about as logical as the rest of your crazy ideas!" Riko stuck out her tongue.

Fujioka noticed that Chiaki had watched the entire exchange intently, at least for the brief period she was awake. If Chiaki had a secret logbook she kept of all such events, it wouldn't have surprised him at all. Fujioka made a mental note to urge Haruka to get on with Chiaki's education. He understood why she didn't want to do it, but at least make Takeru do it!

He also wondered why Chiaki didn't just look it up online.

He inhaled sharply, trying not to show any outward response.

Okay, it was definitely critical to get this done before she thought to do that.

"Hush, guys! Look out the window."

That was Touma, interrupting whatever convoluted argument Riko and Kana had gotten into, which always seemed to entail one of them grabbing hold of Keiko's glasses. They looked out the window.

They were driving up a small paved road toward the top of a large hill, or small mountain. Below them stretched out a picturesque valley, bathed in the colors of autumn. Looking carefully, Fujioka could see households, fruit orchards, and rice paddies.

"And her family owns…"

"This entire mountain, yes," responded Touma.

They were silent for a while, looking. Those on the right piled over to look out the window on the left. It wouldn't be so easy on the way down, when driving on the left would entail hugging the mountainside. But, of course, they'd have plenty of chances to appreciate the view.

When they finally got there, they stood around for a while outside the front entrance, its gate guarded by now-bare trees, waiting for the other car to arrive. The chief housekeeper, who had emerged from the gate, began to point out visible features in the landscape below while they all looked and remarked politely. She stood next to Yoshino and fussed with her jacket, scolding her lightly for choosing one that was too thin. She seemed rather young for her role and, had she not announced who she was at the very beginning, Fujioka would have suspected her to be Yoshino's mother.

Fujioka shifted slightly. He felt uncomfortable, as he always did, under the constant surveillance leveled at him by Takeru. Fujioka just hoped to avoid another drawn-out awkward conversation with Takeru about Fujioka's "intentions".

"Geez, where are they? I'm getting hungry!" asked Kana.

"Now, now, I'm sure they'll get here soon enough. Why don't you get us some snacks?" said Yoshino to the housekeeper.

"Ignore the selfish and rude demands of this baka-yaro. She can wait," cut in Chiaki in her typical acrid manner.

Kana leaned out in her direction, holding up an angry fist.

"What's that you say? I don't recall raising you to-"

A stomach growled loudly. Quick mutual glances determined that Chiaki was the source. She flushed and looked away, into the trees on the side.

"Well-" began Fujioka, trying to change the subject for Chiaki's sake.

"It's okay! There's nothing wrong with getting some snacks. I'll get you some tarts. The orchards here are famous for-"

The housekeeper, in turn, was interrupted by a voice from the thicket of trees where Chiaki had been looking. Looking more carefully, Fujioka could make out a path among the leaves that had collected on the ground.

"Oy! Hey!"

While they all squinted in the increasing twilight at the two approaching figures, Uchida had already dropped her luggage and started to run forward. They hugged at the halfway point before she said, walking back:

"Auntie! Uncle! I told you guys you didn't need to come up here! I was going to go visit you!"

"Oh, but how could we not? And look what we brought!" One of them held up a large bag.

"Ah! Apples…" Uchida's apparent pleasure was marred by a streak of distaste, something her relatives didn't notice.

"Still traumatized, I see." Touma looked as if he shared the sentiment. Fujioka looked at him questioningly for a moment before Yoshino informed them:

"Uchida's relatives live down the hill. They're friends with some of the staff. It's how I met her! And then I said just _had_ to go to the same school."

_That explains a few things_, thought Fujioka.

"We could have picked them up instead of them having to walk…" mused Takeru, thoughtfully rubbing his jaw.

The sound of an approaching vehicle drew their attention back behind them.

Natsuki was the first to emerge from the driver side.

"Sorry we're late. We got really badly lost."

"You mean you let Haruka navi-ow!" commented Kana, interrupted by a smack on the head from Chiaki's book.

Haruka appeared from the left side, looking rather sheepish. Hayami pulled herself out, then dragged out Mako-chan, who was rubbing her eyes. A glimmer of wariness passed over Kana's face at the sight of Hayami, quickly smoothed over.

"Alright, I'll help with the luggage-" began Takeru.

"Yo!" interrupted Hayami. "I hear you have hot springs here, am I right?"

There was a moment of silence. While the others were briefly stunned into silence by Hayami's abrupt manner, Fujioka ran rapidly through the ramifications of this new revelation in his mind.

_Hot springs! God, I hope Kana doesn't remember last time. That was a disaster! And then-_

He looked up, and noticed Mako-chan and Touma wearing similar expressions of dismay. They shared a mutual series of glances, spliced with confusion and thought.

"Well, yes, that's actually why my parents originally built this place," responded Yoshino. "But first things first! We'll have dinner. Oh, but first a tour! I'll show you guys around! I'm sorry, Chiaki, but you'll have to wait to eat." She smiled winningly, clearly in her element.

And thus the day began in earnest.

It turned out that the housekeeper had invited Uchida's relatives, who stayed for dinner and went home afterwards. That dinner, in a back room with wide windows facing the setting sun, was one of the best he'd ever had, though still not quite as good as what had been delivered by that secret admirer of Haruka's. In retrospect, he had to admit that whoever he was, he was a world-class cook.

It was strange that their seats at the banquet-style table had been pre-arranged, with little name cards to indicated where they were expected to sit. While eating—feeling woefully underdressed for some reason—he had tried to get a handle on just what Yoshino was getting at, but didn't quite grasp it.

_There must be some common factor here. I mean what purpose is served by isolating Haruka on the other side of the table away from all the other adults? Why did she seat Riko nowhere near Kana or me? I mean the rest of it makes sense… Am I just being too paranoid? Maybe if I draw it out…_

Keeper Aunt Ta Haya Yo U To Fu Haru

Uncle Ku Na Ri Ma Chi Ka Kei

_Hmm, that didn't help at all. Maybe if-_

"What are you writing?"

"Ah! Minami! Nothing, nothing."

He crumpled the napkin on which he had been writing and hastily shoved it in his pocket.

"Hmm." She regarded him suspiciously. "We were lucky enough for the school to give us some holidays connected with a weekend. Our teacher was kind enough to not give us homework. This is vacation time! Not the time to be writing a story or whatever it is you're doing! Come on! We're going to visit those hot springs Hayami keeps anticipating! So come with me!"

With a final sweep of her arm, she finished her point.

"Yes, yes! Minami!"

He tailed her out, while she mumbled to herself:

"Hmm, Holidays, vacation…holidays…"

As a male, he was in the distinct minority, which was made worse by Touma refusing to participate, instead choosing to go night hiking with Mako-chan, a trip he had suspicions about. Yoshino insisted that it was safe to do so, and talked Chiaki into going as well. This gender disparity really hit home when, walking out in a towel from his room—the assigned rooms followed an arrangement similar to that of their seats and yes, they each got their own room—toward the male side of the hot springs, he ran into the giant group of girls, enshrined in their towels and loudly making their way to the other side.

He flushed and looked away, as did Takeru and Natsuki behind him. But then Kana smiled wickedly—wickedly was the only term he could think of to describe it—and said:

"So, Fujioka. This time, please try to keep your perverted tendencies to yourself. I know it's hard for you, but you already saw far more than you should have last time."

With that, she harrumphed, turned, and kept walking.

The wide-eyed reactions were predictable, except for Riko looking like she was about to faint. Keiko gave Riko some hard slaps on the back to calm her down. Hayami and Kumada wore similar smiles full of mischief. He couldn't look Haruka in the eye.

"It was an accident…" he managed lamely, now beet-red.

He couldn't explain, of course, because to this day he still didn't fully understand what had happened the last time, and his two witnesses were conveniently off in a forest.

He could feel Takeru's eyes boring into the back of his neck.

_What the hell was that?_

By the time they reached the hot pools, he was looking forward to just immersing himself and forgetting his troubles. He placed the towel on the edge and settled in, relaxing…

"So Fujioka-kun."

His eyes snapped open.

"Takeru-san?"

"Just what are your intentions?"

"Yes, I would like to know as well," followed up Natsuki.

He sank downward into the water.

Damn it.

Of course, they stayed up all night. No reference was made to past indiscretions, a fact for which he was glad. They probably all had a slightly different image of his personality now, but, alas, it was probably one he would have to live with.

The only hitch occurred shortly after they had finished gathering in one of the reading rooms, around midnight. Kana made the sudden observation that neither Touma, Mako-chan, nor Chiaki had returned. Just as the search parties were being organized and flashlights distributed, the three turned up at a side entrance, dirty and with slightly ripped clothing. Mako-chan, it seemed, had lost the path despite her flashlight and tripped into some sort of small ravine. Some guy passing by had helped them get back. Haruka fussed over them and they quickly changed inside their rooms.

"Did you see who he was? He probably lives around here," asked Yoshino.

"No," responded Chiaki. "We weren't able to see his face. It was too dark."

"He had his shirt unbuttoned for some reason. In this kind of weather! I thought he was a pervert!" said Touma.

"Okay, so that hike wasn't such a great idea," Yoshino admitted. "What's with you guys though? Uchida and I used to do this all the time, and we were second-graders! "

"Yes, and you gave us all heart attacks doing it," commented one of the housekeepers who happened to be walking by. "And you guys had trackers."

"Only later on," Yoshino commented.

Uchida chuckled.

"Yeah, we snuck out all the time."

"Actually, Yoshino, I've been wondering…" began Kana. They turned to look at her.

"I 'm sorry for asking, but, uh, we haven't seen your parents at all. I don't think of any of us have. Did something happen to them?"

"Kana!" Riko admonished.

"No, no, it's alright," Yoshino said.

She leaned back, looking up.

"I rarely ever see them either. They're always traveling everywhere. It's important to maintain our wealth, you see. It's okay, though. I get to live wherever I want and do whatever I want. The servants are nice. If you're wondering, I lived here until I decided to move to the city to follow Uchida"—she looked faintly embarrassed—"and they treat me well. The chief housekeeper here actually follows me around. She doesn't stay here. I've had a good life."

She looked sad, though, and didn't get back up. An awkward silence descended. Uchida was giving Kana a death-glare. Fujioka had never seen her with such an expression and was glad not to be the recipient of it. But why was Kana acting so weird?

"So…" began Keiko and Riko, simultaneously trying to break the ice. They glanced at each other and Keiko assented.

"So," Riko continued, rubbing the back of her head, "Keiko and I found these Monopoly sets stacked inside her room and we were thinking-"

"Monopoly?" asked four voices simultaneously. Chiaki and Kana leaned forward, Uchida's expression instantly changed, and Yoshino sat back up with sudden energy.

"Uh…yes?" replied Riko. She and Keiko instinctively cringed towards each other, suddenly nonplussed.

Like the other adults—except Natsuki, who watched them from a corner, looking stern and being thoroughly ignored—Haruka was asleep in her room. But had she been there, she would have been able to tell Riko and Keiko about the deadly mistake they had made. There was a reason she had quietly given their set away years ago.

So it was that they spent their night to the tune of rolling dice, property trading, and loud laments about the unfairness of the luxury tax, income tax, and criminal prosecution system. Snickers were shared about Fujioka winning the beauty contest and bank errors were smugly pocketed. Capricious gods ensured that Yoshino's hotel received plenty of visitors while Fujioka's only ever entertained Fujioka himself.

Kana was the first in either game to go bankrupt, of course.

* * *

The next morning—or afternoon, rather— was bright and cool. Fujioka put on a fresh set of clothing, attended to his victuals in the bathroom, and went out to face the day.

He found Yoshino and Mako-chan dragging Uchida out of her room, blocking his path.

"I don't want to! Let me sleep! I need my beauty sleep!" She was struggling, actually struggling, bracing herself against the doorframe, trying to get back into her room.

"No!" replied Yoshino. "We promised to visit your relatives! You can't keep sleeping! Do you"—she grunted with effort—"have any idea what time it is!"

With that, Uchida's resistance suddenly buckled as she flew out of the door and onto the floor into a vulnerable prone position, almost kneeling on the floor. Fujioka flushed and quickly turned his head away. It was a good thing Mako-chan's head had blocked the rather compromising sight Fujioka would have otherwise borne witness to.

He waited until Uchida was back up, being apologized to rather profusely by Mako-chan, before continuing on. Yoshino shepherded the begrudged, tired-looking Uchida into a bathroom and stood guard over her like a sentinel while she brushed her teeth.

The sight that greeted him in the dining hall was a surprise. A wide assortment of servants and adults were hanging up unfamiliar decorations. Kana stood in the middle, ordering them around like some sort of director.

"What's going on here?" he asked Kana, rubbing his eyes. He was still rather sleepy.

"I couldn't sleep, so I was thinking. We're here, in a lovely villa in the middle of the beautiful countryside, and it's a holiday! We absolutely have to have a festival! But I couldn't think of one. So I got Haruka's laptop and looked some up. Yoshino has a ridiculous internet connection, by the way. I found one that looks good. Some American one called Halloween. They have these decorations, and we get to dress up—Yoshino says she can get some costumes—, and-"

_Wait, wait. Kana, the King—Queen_, he quickly corrected himself—_of sleeping in, can't sleep? And leaving that aside-_

"I could have sworn that holiday wasn't today. Or even this week."

"Who cares! It sounds fun! And I guarantee you no one here has had a Halloween party before!"

Once again, he found himself in awe of Kana's energy. His knees weakened and he had a strong urge to just seize her in his arms and-

He shook his head. What was he, crazy? Anyway, it reminded him of something he had to do.

He found Touma helping servants cut paper into shapes.

"What are those supposed to be?"

"Well, they're supposed to resemble pumpkins with faces carved in them."

He held one up to the light.

"I don't see it, though," he continued. "Since when are pumpkins orange? Ah well, we're just going by internet pictures."

"Touma, I want you to take a walk with me. We need to talk, remember?"

"Ah yes, right. Sorry, guys. I'm going to have to go for a while."

"I haven't eaten yet. Do you know where I can get food?"

"I'll take you there. Just let me finish this last one."

A while later, they walked to the edge of the grounds, near the pools they had been shown yesterday. They walked onto a path between two of them. Touma picked up a stone and skipped it all the way across one.

"…that's impressive."

"I know."

They stood silent for a moment, looking into the near-denuded trees.

"You said you would reveal the rest of what you were planning when you got here."

"Yes, yes I did."

"I was surprised you got Yoshino to agree to this so readily."

"Well, we're infringing on her hospitality, yeah, but it's not like the cost even means anything to her. She likes doing stuff like this. I mean she's even trying to control Uchida's diet to make her more attractive! When I told her the point here was to set you up with Kana, she got out way ahead of me. It's not a coincidence she assigned Kana the room next to you."

"Yeah, I noticed that. I'm not even sure if there's a dignified way of taking advantage of that."

"That depends. What exactly does "take advantage of" mean in this context?"

"You mean you don't know?"

"If I knew, I would have told Chiaki years ago."

_Man, how is that even possible? This guy reads manga all the time, for one thing._

"You know, Haruka is really being childish by procrastinating for so long. I can understand but-"

"Then tell us! And what's so embarrassing about it that you can't talk about it?"

"Let's…uh, let's just drop this topic. Tell me about what you had planned."

Touma crouched down and looked in the water.

"Honestly, I didn't plan on so many people being here. I didn't expect Riko, or Keiko. I should have told Yoshino not to invite them! She should have known not to. It'll be hard getting Kana alone with those two around...I guess what I'm saying is that I don't have a plan anymore."

"I see. I thought so. I have no reason to complain. We're in a beautiful location, eating good food, enjoying life, all based off of Yoshino's hospitality. I should be able to do this myself. It's pathetic, no offense, that I'm relying on you anyway."

"Well, see, the original idea was just to get the two of you alone anyway. The rest would be up to you. We weren't going to handhold you the whole way. That wouldn't work in the long-run anyway."

"Yeah…"

Another silence. It was the kind of day for silences. Fujioka crouched down, then—since it was embarrassingly hurting his calves—sat.

"I'm worried about Yoshino." Fujioka continued.

"What do you mean?"

"Her parents should…gah, I don't know. If they were here, I'd chew them out."

"It's strange. She's referred to her parents more than once in front of me. In normal terms, too, even after I knew the truth. Who was she talking about? Was she making it up?"

"It's definitely worrying…"

"I think she's fine, though," Touma asserted, after a moment.

"Really?"

"She's got Uchida, and she's got the rest of us. That's enough for now."

"What do you mean?"

"As her friends, we have to be her surrogate family. And I think we're doing a pretty good job at that. But I'm also saying that...well, let's just say she won't be setting Uchida up on dates anytime soon, and the diet she's enforcing is at least partly selfish."

"Are you saying-"

"Nah, I'm just guessing. But it seems possible, right?"

"...maybe."

Fujioka sat for a while, digesting. Was this a good time to ask?

"…you know, I had an interesting dream recently."

"Really? What was it about?"

"…no, nevermind."

Fujioka stirred the pond water with his hand. Not now. Not yet. Not while he was unsure. But, when he has, he would have to act. This he had decided.

He changed the subject.

"You know, your brother is watching us. He's hiding behind the corner of the building back there."

"I know. I've decided to just ignore him."

* * *

Despite Yoshino's promise, it wasn't easy to come up with costumes. In the end they had to improvise.

For instance, Yoshino had a variety of masks, tuxedos, and wooden swords—"for a school play," she said—as well as variety of kimonos of various sizes. So, most of the males ended up just wearing a mask, tuxedo, and sword, while some of the females wore kimonos. Some had more creative ideas, however.

Riko borrowed a French maid outfit from one of the maids who explained:

"Okay, so when I got this job I had a mistaken impression of what I was supposed to wear. Shut up. Just take it."

Riko also borrowed Keiko's glasses, which she tried to wear for a while before looking nauseous and giving up. Keiko donned contacts—"What? I'm not allowed to have contacts? Geez! I just prefer glasses."—and tried to dress up as some sort of bird. It didn't look good on her.

Yoshino dug up a guitar from somewhere and went around wearing it. Chiaki attached Fuijoka the bear to her neck, lurching around as some sort of two-headed monster and mumbling something about humanoid interfaces. Touma commented that that didn't make any sense at all. Haruka put on an apron and donned a giant hair bow.

"I've always wanted to wear a giant hair bow."

_But what's the apron for?_

Kumada donned the nurse's outfit she had brought with her for reasons that weren't entirely clear. Fujioka questioned whether that even qualified as a costume. She spent the entire time talking with the masked Takeru in a corner.

"Doesn't Takeru-san have a girlfriend or something?" he tried to ask Haruka.

"Shoo, shoo. Stop staring at them."

As for Fujioka himself, he got talked by Kana into donning a matching set of costumes, based on some character she saw somewhere or something like that. Unfortunately—especially for Fujioka—Haruka forbade her from walking around in a skimpy bra and made her put on a shirt.

"Oh well. It wouldn't have worked anyway. I mean, where am I going to get a giant gun anyway?" she said, sighing.

"Who did you make me dress up as, anyway?"

"Nevermind. It's not important."

The most…interesting costumes Fujioka saw had to belong to Mako-chan and Touma, who were another matching set. It was right after he had found Hayami standing next to the carbonated drinks, looking sad and talking to herself.

"Damn it. I knew I should have brought it. I should have brought the juice!"

"Juice?" he asked.

"It's not important."

With that, she walked away.

"Fujioka!"

He turned with his cola in his hands.

"Oh, so you guys are here-erk!"

He almost dropped his soda.

Mako-chan had elected to adopt a male hair style, and don the tuxedo and matching accessories.

"It's very important that the mask covers the face," she said, in a deeper voice than normal.

Indeed, she did look rather convincing.

The bigger shocker, the reason he had almost dropped his cup, was Touma, who had not just dressed up as a rock star, but a _female_ rock star, complete with black skirt, guitar, tank top, and obvious breasts. He even twirled and, in a girlish voice said:

"How do I look?"

_Disturbingly hot_, Fujioka's brain automatically answered.

"Uh, very realistic. What…what made you choose to wear this?"

"Oh, it was Kana's idea. I think I'm pretty good at this, don't you think?" he said in that same creepily feminine voice. He elbowed Mako-chan.

Mako-chan seemed reluctant to talk, so they walked off.

He stared at Touma's back for a while before shaking his head clear and downing his drink.

He had been thinking about it ever since that damn dream had given him the idea. It just explained so much, including the behavior he didn't understand and the events he had previously justified with absurdly convoluted explanations.

_Can there be any doubt now? What boy could possibly pull off an act like that? _He thought carefully, unaware of the irony of his words.

It was an interesting "festival."

* * *

After they called it a day, he found Touma helping some of the staff clean up. He hadn't taken off the costume.

"What's that? You need to talk again? Argh, I'm busy."

She sighed.

" Well, whatever. Sorry, guys! I guess that's all I can do today!"

They sought out the same isolated spot they had found earlier. The night was bright with moonlight and the ponds looked like something out of a poem.

"So? What is it? Kana say something to you? I don't mean to be rude, but this costume is cold. I think I finally understand why girls complain about the cold all the time."

"Actually..."

He rubbed the back of his head, a nervous gesture he was going to have to learn to drop. Now that it was finally time to put his suspicions to rest, one way or the other, he couldn't continue. How could he make this accusation? But the evidence was right there in front of his face, in the way Touma wore her new clothes, the way she moved, the way she talked. She had lowered her pitch again, but her voice carried a new modulation. She probably wasn't even aware she was doing it, but it triggered in Fujioka subconscious cues on every level that screamed "female!" It wasn't possible to mimic those kinds of societal signals, not without years of training. It just wasn't. He was even starting to think of her to himself as female.

"Well? Out with it! Look, I can understand if it's too embarrassing to say to me. You don't have to tell me."

He swallowed hard.

"There's no easy way for me to say this..."

"Then just say it!"

She said it strongly, the way she always did, as if nothing was wrong. But her voice faltered slightly. She was beginning to understand the situation.

He couldn't look her in the eye. Instead, he looked off into the trees, as he had done so often earlier.

"...you're not really a boy, are you?"

She didn't respond. The silence was unbearable. He began talking rapidly, more to fill space than anything. He couldn't bring himself to turn and look at her.

"It's funny, you know. All this time, I've thought of you as the little brother I never had. You told me how unreliable your older brothers were, so I tried to do everything they should have done. I trained you, taught you soccer tricks, fought you when the situation demanded. Why did you lie to me? Were you afraid I would have treated you differently? I wouldn't-no, that's a lie. I would have thought of you differently, I wouldn't have found you so special in that household full of girls. But still! You would have just had to say something-"

"Shut up!"

She screamed it, so loud that were such concerns his primary focus, he would have worried about the rest of the house hearing her, so charged that it lost all the modulations that Touma donning her new outfit had gained it. The voice that came out was the Touma he knew, the boyish, undeniably male brother. So perfect was it, in fact, that it put chills through his spine, caused him for a moment to doubt himself, doubt his _sanity_-

And then he finished turning, and saw her face.

_This was a mistake_, he instantly regretted.

Her composure was broken, her face twisted in suppressed emotion.

"Shut up! Shut up! It's not true! You-you've gone mad! What's wrong with you? How could you say such a thing?"

Her voice was wavering, breaking in places, oscillating in pitch. She couldn't keep this up. "How could you? After all we've done together? How could you?"

It was no longer an angry yell, but merely loud speech, subsiding to a choked whisper. She was tearing up. His mind cast about desperately for something to say.

_Oh God. I should never have done this! I should have known how important this was to her! I didn't expect-_

"I am a boy!" She forced out through tears. "A boy! Do you hear me? I'm-"

"That's right!"

They both stopped, surprised at the new voice.

They hadn't noticed Chiaki running up to them, despite the brightness of the night. She inserted herself between Touma and Fujioka like a shield.

"Touma's a boy, Fujioka, and don't you ever forget it! You will _not_ say he is anything else. You got that? He's a boy and he's my-"

She didn't finish the sentence the way he expected, by saying "little brother." Instead she just stood there, breathing hard.

"Let's go, Touma. Forget him."

Wiping her face with her arm, Touma nodded and grabbed Chiaki's outstretched hand.

Fujioka watched them walk off. Only Chiaki seemed to have heard them. He was glad Kana hadn't noticed and instantly felt bad for caring so much for appearance.

_What was I thinking? To think-!_

He couldn't even finish the thought. Instead, he began to slowly follow them back, to where the others were still gathering for another all-nighter. They would all sense the awkwardness.

A hand grabbed his shoulder.

"Hold it right there, pretty-boy."

He quickly turned around, then lifted his head upward to look at Natsuki's face. He pulled back a step.

"I heard everything. You should thank Chiaki-chan for coming when she did. I was getting ready to walk over and punch you out."

Fujioka definitely started backing up then.

"Stop right there!"

He stopped.

"I won't do that. Not now. But I couldn't have just left her like that. I would have had to stop it somehow. I'm sure you understand."

He nodded, having relaxed just a little.

"Surrogate brother, huh?" Natsuki asked rhetorically. "Well, I guess we deserve it. It's our fault, after all."

"Your fault for what?"

"Our fault she turned out like this. That foolish Haruo will never admit it, but growing up with three incompetent brothers like us has hurt her. Since I've gotten older, I've tried to make up for it, but it's far too late now."

Natsuki sighed and leaned into the wooden wall. Relaxing, Fujioka adopted a reciprocal posture on the balcony.

"She wants to be a boy?"

"I don't know. I have no idea. She likes it the best when I treat her like I treat Akira, which is what I've learned to do. The other two try to treat her like a sister, but of course it only pisses her off."

"I see. That explains a lot."

"It probably does. But she shouldn't have lied about who she was just because she didn't want to be treated like a girl."

"If she had just said something..."

"You know, I thought you were some sort of boyfriend, at first."

Fujioka, who just happened to be swallowing some extra spit, coughed and spluttered at this.

"Seriously?"

"It was the only logical conclusion, or so I thought. But despite how mad I was, I was relieved, you know? I thought this would at least motivate her to get more feminine. That was the theory, anyway. But now I know better."

"I see..."

"What I really want to ask you is..."

"Yes?"

"It seems rather weird to say out loud, but...is there something going on with her and Chiaki? There's nothing wrong with two girls being close friends, but I've seen some things recently which make me think..."

_Oh shit!_ Fujioka had completely forgotten about that.

"Not that I know of."

"You sure?"

"Yes."

"I see. At least she hasn't gotten _that_ boyish. Yet."

"I, uh, guess not."

Fujioka rubbed the back of his head nervously again. Natsuki started to walk off.

Deciding to lie to Natsuki had been based purely on gut instinct. He hadn't had time to think about it. He hoped it had been the right decision.

"Wait!"

"What is it?"

"Shouldn't you do something? You saw her! How could you just go sleep at a time like this?"

"I have no idea what to do. I don't have a clue. We lost her, Fujioka. We lost her a long time ago. No, don't interrupt, let me finish explaining."

Natsuki had stopped and turned, and was waving his hand to stop Fujioka from protesting further. He looked up into the awning, and put his hands into his pockets.

"When we were younger, she followed us everywhere. And we took her everywhere. Our only sister, the only daughter our parents ever had. She was our pet, and we showed her off to the neighbors and took her out for ice cream."

He paused.

"I don't know when we lost that, or how, but we did. None of us have had a real conversation with her in years."

It might have been Fujioka's imagination, but he thought he saw, just for a moment, something glimmer in Natsuki's eyes.

Suddenly Natsuki seemed to reorient himself.

"Before you get any wrong ideas, don't compare myself to that foolish older brother of mine. I'm not an idiot like him. Well, anyway, I hope that answers your questions. I'll be seeing you. I don't have to watch you anymore, so I'm just going to go sleep. Hurry on. They'll be wondering where you are."

"You really are a horrible brother."

Fujioka didn't fully mean it.

"Probably," Natsuki admitted.

* * *

Much later, after they had all piled off to bed, Fujioka stared at the ceiling, unable to sleep.

Strangely enough, after an initial rough patch, he had managed to avoid any outward awkwardness with Chiaki and Touma. That was greatly relieving, even though he knew it didn't resolve anything. Still, he had difficulty enjoying himself; he knew that both he and Touma were only pretending for the benefit of the others. Like Natsuki, he had no idea what to do.

It wore on him. His mind spun restlessly, considering what to do and how to do it. He thought of Touma, and Chiaki, and Kana, and, after some deep consideration, Mako-chan. He wondered if he was starting to see ghosts that weren't there.

_Forget it. I'm not going to sleep. I might as well get a drink of water and try to calm down. _

He pushed himself up off the bed. The moonlight was almost glaringly bright through the large window.

_Hmm. Full moon._

He wandered out into the hallway, through the moonlight cast by another open door next to his, and to the nearest kitchen in the building. He was easily able to see in the ambient moonlight. On the way he passed the room used by Takeru. He heard voices. Against his better instincts, he leaned in.

"…and you know, Rika-san…and…"

"…sad…..single, right?"

Fujioka hurried on. It was their business, after all.

He grabbed a glass from the cupboard and walked over to a faucet.

_I wonder if the tap water here is drinkable,_ he mused, holding up an empty glass to the light.

Tap. Tap.

He heard footfalls behind him.

Suddenly paranoid, he turned rapidly, ready to run.

"Oh, it's you," Kana said.

"Yeah."

They looked at each other. They both wore only sleeping clothes, which in Kana's case was a T-shirt and light pants. She had her hair down for the night.

"I can't sleep, so I'm going to hike the mountain. Want to come with me?"

"In those clothes? In this weather? Wait, why?"

"I don't want to wake Haruka. She has our clothes. Now are you coming or not?"

"But-! Er…I'm coming."

He abandoned his protests the moment he saw the determined look on her face. He knew nothing he could say would turn her back. All he could do now was to go with her.

A wave of cold air hit him as they walked out the door. The path she chose seemed, improbably, to lead even higher up the mountain.

"Kana, it's really cold out here," he said. "Are you sure you want to do this?"

"We'll be fine. I did this yesterday and came back fine."

"…I see."

They continued to climb, weaving through the trees. He cradled himself for warmth, shivering, but said nothing because the fiery girl in front of him seemed impervious to the cold. Her hair swirled and turned in the wind.

The path was both steep and treacherous, and more than once he wanted to urge her to turn back, but bit his tongue. It seemed interminably long, and he rapidly lost track of the amount of time they spent climbing, focusing only on staying warm.

Finally, after he couldn't hold it in anymore:

"Minami, why are we doing this?"

"I'll tell you when we get there. Look! We're almost there."

The trees finally began to thin out and he realized they were approaching a clearing at the summit. So he quieted down.

There was a conveniently placed rock at the top. She motioned they should sit, so he did, rather awkwardly, as the rock wasn't really meant for two people.

"Beautiful view, isn't it?"

"Yes, it is," he responded, uncomfortably aware how close they were. He could feel her side on his back.

He looked at the moonlit landscape, and, indeed, the moonlight shrouded the landscape in an ethereal twilight that was incredible to look at.

"Have I ever told you how much you resemble my father?"

Kana's voice was almost a whisper, so that he had to strain to hear it. When he finally processed what she had said, he responded, cognizant that this was no ordinary conversation.

"No, no you haven't." His heart had begun to increase its pace.

"You do. You two are pretty similar."

"I see…"

Another silence.

"The last time I saw him was on a mountain just like this."

He turned to look at her in surprise. The soft look on her face tore his heart.

"We were on vacation. My mother died giving birth to Chiaki, you know. So it was just him. At the time Chiaki was only three, so I don't know if she remembers. But I do."

"Haruka had thrown a tantrum, so she refused to come. I was the only one he took up that night."

"It was a mountain just like this, and the view as just as beautiful. We sat on the rock and he patted my head and pointed at the landscape and talked about my mother…"

Fujioka had nothing to say, so he listened. He watched her hair in the eerie lighting.

"…and then a worker came running up the hill, saying there was a phone call, it was urgent. He took me back, and drove out that very night, leaving it to Takeru's mother to take care of us and drive us back."

She paused.

"Car crashes are terrible things."

Fujioka thought carefully and finally spoke:

"I've always felt out of place among all of you. I've always had a normal family life. My parents were always there. I look at Yoshino, and Touma, and you, and…I know I can't understand. I never can. But I can try."

Neither spoke. Finally Kana said:

"I'm cold."

She leaned into his shoulder and shifted to be next to him.

His heartbeat grew louder and louder, so that he could hear it reverberate in his ears. He looked down and imagined how it would feel to bend down, touch those lips…

He didn't. Instead, he ran his hand through her hair, weaving the strands between his fingers, and commented:

"You have such beautiful hair. I don't know why you wear it up all the time. It looks so much better this way."

They waited.

"You're an idiot, you know," she said, closing her eyes and dipping her head slightly before suddenly standing straight up. "Let's go back."

The moment had ended.

* * *

The next day, Touma surprised him by appearing at his door. For a moment, they just looked at each other.

"I was talking with Chiaki and...I want to apologize for last night," she said. "I didn't mean to blow up at you. I guess I went a little crazy. Actually, the truth is-"

He held up a hand to forestall her. She wasn't using her boyish tone of voice.

"I'm the one who should apologize. I should have known better. And Chiaki was right. You are a boy. For as long as and whenever you want to be."

Touma looked at him carefully.

"...you sure?"

"Of course I am."

It was what he had finally decided.

"I see."

Touma cleared his throat. He returned to his normal voice.

"Well, in that case...where were you last night? I noticed your door was open. Kana's door was open also…"

"I'd rather not say."

"I see…"

Touma glanced around behind her in the hallway.

"Would you like me to think of something else? You know, for when we get back? Or are you okay?"

He smiled.

"No, I'm fine. Thanks for everything."

Touma thought about that, then returned the smile.

"Ah, sure. Sure. Anyway, Kana says she wants everyone to go hiking to the summit, so you should get ready. See? I already have my jacket and everything."

"I proved you wrong, you know."

"What? About what?"

"Nevermind..."

As he walked to his room, he reflected. He had a lot to think about.

Kana's words continued to fill his thoughts.

_You're an idiot_, she had said.

* * *

Ah, school.

It was such a letdown after the last four days.

_Sigh. Why can't it be break already?_

He yawned and rubbed his eyes. Trudging along the hallway with his bag, he thought about how he clearly wasn't used to getting up early anymore…and how much getting up early sucked.

He pulled the door open and walked in. His ears perked up.

"A new hairstyle, Kana?"

Riko's voice.

"Well, I thought it was time for a change. I've been wearing those twintails forever, you know. Just a little variety. I'll change it back tomorrow."

"I think you should keep it! It looks cute on you!"

"Well, of course _you_ would think so."

He walked further forward, so he could see around Keiko.

Long hair, carefully brushed. Hair down beyond the shoulders.

He sucked in a breath. His heart rate soared.

This could only be a signal. Even he could see that.

He swallowed. In that moment, two and a half years of experiences presented themselves in his mind. Filled his thoughts—and reached the breaking point.

Running into a girl on the day of the entrance ceremony. Her apology for the collision wasn't really an apology at all, but something about her…

First seeing her playing soccer in PE. She had no skill, no patience, but her dedication and will had seared itself on his heart.

Finally swallowing his anxiety and putting his feelings to paper. Slipping it into her locker.

Rejected for the first time, with a deleveraging kick to his calf, no less. Even as he had fallen, and his mind swirled in confusion, he could not help but admire her flair.

Meeting her family for the first time, and being kicked out for his trouble, carrying a cauldron of bad curry.

A thousand visits. A bushel of humiliations. The unending bizarreness and confusion.

Fending off suitors to her and refusing suitors to him.

Meeting her eccentric consortium of friends, and interacting with them to the point of abandoning his own.

The incident in the hot springs, and the years of hormone-charged dreams it had only served to enflame.

Bruises from the kicks and punches that he had received for foolish actions.

Weeks of hellish studying and review, along with constant beratement from Keiko, to be rewarded with a school that took an hour to get to—but also one they could go to together.

A day of abuse by a girl three years his junior, just so he could learn to patch together a reasonable meal—which was ignored.

Forcing himself up a chilly mountain in nothing but nightclothes.

Trial and tribulation. The path had been long and difficult. More than once he had questioned his own sanity. More than once he had almost lost the will to continue.

_You're an idiot, you know. _The words replayed themselves endlessly in his mind.

She had understood, of course. But he could not. After so much, he could not believe that it was here. Could not understand that for once, she had made the moves, had seen the opportunity and opened the door. It was wide open, but so used was he to bashing himself against a brick wall that he thought it an illusion and would not step through.

It was the _right_ choice, of course. He had stayed true to himself. She was vulnerable. She was not herself. The trip had served to weaken her, remind her of a past she'd rather forget. So he must refuse. She could not be trusted to think correctly. She would regret it once she returned home. He had to decide for her.

An ironic smile impinged on his features. He would have to take back what he had said to Touma.

He had underrated Kana. She was not so weak; that was supposedly why he loved her. It was not his right or duty to override her decisions, but he had done her the disservice of thinking it was.

It had been the _right_ choice, but not the _correct_ one.

And he had been forgiven.

She had been right all along. There was no need to knock, not anymore. He need only place his hand on the doorknob, and open.

Forget caution. Damn the torpedoes. It was time to see just what those lips felt like.

He stepped forward.

* * *

_Author's note: I can only hope Admiral Farragut would be proud._

_Various saved up comments from throughout the chapters:_

_As you may be aware, season 1 and the later seasons had a radically different design for the Minami household. For instance, season 1 had a hallway leading straight into a normal door to the kotatsu room, while the others had a hallway with sliding door on the right side. Also, Kana and Chiaki had separate rooms in the first season and shared a room later on. Because I sort of prefer the second design and the manga doesn't ever make it clear, I went with that, but I tried to use those details as little as possible. Of course, in the first chapter, when Fujioka walks in, it was important to get in some hyperrealism._

_In addition, anime and manga has a long tradition of rather unrealistically colored hair-*looks at Atsuko and her blue/green hair*-and the hair and character designs had a habit of changing radically through the seasons. I could have gone with manga standard, but I decided it would be better just to avoid references to it except for those with realistic hair colors, to preserve the pseudo-realism of Minami-ke._

_I've often wondered why Chiaki has never tried looking for the answers to her questions online. For the sake of sanity, I do hope she never chooses to._

_Touma's pumpkin comment: I'm making the guess that Japanese isn't very clear on the difference between pumpkins and Japanese squash, just like Chinese calls them by almost the same name. If I'm wrong…well I'm wrong. I felt the need to make that obscure joke._

_Yes, the Halloween costume thing is one giant excuse for seiyuu jokes…and to get Touma into a sexy outfit that Fujioka can ogle without her getting revealed._

_I realize now I've made Yoshino, Touma, and Natsuki into somewhat tragic characters..._

_I deliberately gave all the major subplots open-ended resolutions. It just didn't feel right ending them decisively, at least not without another story to deal with them as they deserve. The only plotlines I actually finished was the Fujioka x Kana one, and to some degree the Fujioka/Touma angle. Yes, I consider them a fully established couple by the end of this story, despite me not actually writing the part where he kisses Kana in the middle of the classroom in front of Keiko and Riko. It's heavily implied in the ending!_

_And some questions to think about, because I'm afraid of people not noticing T_T._

_What's the deal with Touma/Chiaki/Makoto?_

_In mid-chapter 2, what is Touma worried about?_

_In chapter 2, both Fujioka and Kana stop abruptly mid-sentence, at different points. What stopped them? Why does Kana end up so pissed?_

_At the end of chapter 3, why did Touma smile?_

_Why exactly did Fujioka's actions in Chapter 4 work?_

_(Easy) Why does Touma wear oversized shirts?_

_Why was Touma so afraid of showing childhood pictures?_

_Why was Kana so afraid? (I don't know the answer to this one)_

_(Super-easy) Who is the Secret Admirer/curry fairy/stripping man?_

_What is Chiaki thinking about in the van?_

_What are Maki and Atsuko busy with?_

_The source of Touma's ideas is classified. What is it?_

_What are Hayami's goals here?_

_What is Yoshino trying to do, anyway? (two-parts)_

_What do you think? Is Touma right about Yoshino liking Uchida in that way? I don't know the answer._

_Why does Kana act so strange throughout chapter 6?_

_Yes, I realize I just did a roughly 500-word comment section. I'm sorry. T_T_


	7. Omake: A Day in the Life

"_Where are you going, Haruka-nee-sama?"_

_ "I'll only be gone for a while. I'll be right back."_

_ "I don't believe that."_

_ "Of course you can-"_

_ She stopped when she turned around and realized she was talking to no one._

_ "Chiaki? Kana? Where did you guys go?" she asked with increasing desperation, already knowing the answer. She sprinted out the open front door and reached the bottom floor with an alacrity only possible in dreams. In the distance the two of them walked, hand-in-hand, growing ever farther away. For a moment, she watched them walk away._

_ "Wait! Come back!"_

_ It was Kana who turned to look back at her. Despite the distance, Haruka understood what she was saying._

_ "Remember. It wasn't we who left you. It was you who left us."_

_ "That's not true! Come back!"_

_ She broke into a sprint, but they continued, impossibly, to recede into the distance. No matter how fast she ran, she couldn't-_

The alarm sounded, a shrill whining tone she had chosen for its ability to wake her instantly. Every morning, she hated herself for that choice.

Her hand flew out, much faster than it did normally, and slammed the off button. The digital clock, tethered by its power cord, flew into the opposite wall before rebounding to the floor.

_Eep!_

She jumped out of bed, for once instantly clearing away the allure of sleep, and hurried to pick up the clock.

_Ah good. It still works._

She frowned at the new dent in its plastic coating, half an inch away from another dent a week old. The details of the dream were fading fast, but its emotional impact remained.

_I don't have time to think about that now._

The clock read nine. She could afford to get up slightly later in the day on Saturdays, but it was still important that she get up before her sisters, and Chiaki usually never slept past nine thirty. She would never say it, but she often wished Chiaki would be just a little lazier, for her sake.

She changed quickly into the clothes she had carefully prepared for herself the night before, stepped into the bathroom, and perfunctorily brushed her hair and teeth. She paused on her way to the kitchen to glance in on her sisters, then triggered the rice cooker—filled with rice that had also been prepared the previous day. She downed a cup of water and began preparing breakfast.

Once she was satisfied that she could relax for a moment, waiting for water to boil on the stove, she stepped outside to stretch in the sunlight, and incidentally eye the day's weather.

"Ah! Another fine spring morning!" she said to no one in particular.

She stepped back inside, preparing to finish chopping the carrots and place them in the boiling water. It was nice no longer having to cajole and threaten Chiaki into eating carrots, she reflected.

She glanced at the kitchen clock. Nine twenty.

_I can probably have Chiaki help with the potatoes, once she gets up. It won't be long now._

An hour later, having finished her breakfast and started dusting the living room, she was still waiting. It wasn't her style to interrupt her sisters' sleep on precious weekends, but...

Finally, Chiaki stepped into the room, rubbing her eyes and looking rather sheepish.

"Good morning, Chiaki!"

"Good morning, Haruka-nee-sama. Sorry for getting up so late."

"It's fine. It's fine. Don't worry about it."

As Chiaki sat down at the kitchen table to consume her food, Haruka thought about it.

Chiaki was doing this more and more often now. Haruka was also starting to catch her up late, quietly on the computer chatting with Uchida, or keeping Kana company in her own late night vigils. Just last week, Chiaki and Kana had started implying to her that they wanted a TV in their room, presumably to watch at night in lieu of sleep.

It probably wouldn't be that big a deal. Gone now were the days when she would have to harangue and browbeat and beg Kana into doing homework and studying. And Chiaki had always been reliable. However, it couldn't be good for their health to stay up so late, only to force themselves up in the morning scant hours later for school. She would have to find some way to turn them down. As for the other late night merriment...well, she'd just have to trust them to keep it under control.

_That reminds me..._

She strode into the kitchen and sat down across from Chiaki. She looked carefully, judging size.

Chiaki stopped, spoonful of porridge midway to mouth.

"Is...Is something wrong, Haruka-nee-sama? Why are you starting at my chest like that?"

"Oh nothing. It's nothing. You're fine for now."

_But not for much longer. Maybe the next time we go shopping for clothes together..._

"Fine for what? What are you talking about?"

"Ah, well, that is..."

The doorbell chimed.

_Good timing!_

"I'll get that! I wonder who it could be." she said, jumping up and rushing to the door.

"It's obviously-"

"Fujioka! Come in! I'll get you some tea."

"Ah, thanks. Oh, hi, Chiaki."

"Hello."

Chiaki looked down at him, sitting next to the kotatsu.

"Chiaki! Go get your sister up!"

"I'm already on it."

Haruka hummed quietly to herself, taking advantage of the hot water machine and newly bought spring tea leaves. It should brew excellently. It better, given how much she had shelled out for it.

As she was picking up the tea tray, she heard Kana show up in the living room.

_That was fast_.

Haruka paused just a moment. No need to interrupt them just yet. She listened.

"What's with you? I don't recall instructing you to arrive this early!" Kana berated.

"Well, you know, I figured..."

_He really should know better_, she thought to herself.

"Tch. Well, whatever. Just don't try to sneak any peeks while I'm changing!"

"I wouldn't dare."

Hearing Kana walk off, she smiled to herself, then walked into the room and set the tray down, placing the cups out. Chiaki was already securely seated between Fujioka's legs.

"Ah, no, that's okay. I can pour my own," Fujioka protested.

"No, no, let me." She started pouring the tea into his cup. "So where are you planning to take them for lunch?"

"Ah, well." He did that thing where he rubbed the back of his head. "I was going to let Kana pick a place."

"Tch. You've got to have more initiative than that! Pick yourself! Go for someplace romantic!"

_Living vicariously through my siblings,_ she mused. _I wonder what that makes me_.

"Ah, well, but you know Kana..."

"Haruka-nee-sama. I was thinking. If the three of us are going shopping for the rest of the day, and you're meeting your friends, then what about Touma?"

Haruka stopped for a moment.

_..._

"I totally forgot about Touma," she admitted.

"Why not bring her with you? I'm sure she wouldn't have any problems with that."

"That's-well...I guess I have to now. She's probably already on her way."

The truth was, she didn't really want to expose her sisters, or any of their friends, to Hayami more than she had to.

"Let's go!" exhorted Kana, sliding into the doorway of the living room.

Quickly, Haruka glanced over Kana in her red skirt and stylish black jacket.

_She's put quite an effort into thinking up her outfit today. And I've never seen those pink hair bows before..._

"Not yet! You haven't even had breakfast yet!"

"I'll eat it right now! Give it to me!"

They watched as Kana shoveled the lovingly prepared meal down her throat. She then proceeded to drag the other two out the door.

"Good-bye! Don't stay out too late! Take good care of her, Fujioka!" She waved as they hurried along the railing.

"I will!" He said, turning and waving back.

She watched them walk away.

* * *

"I brought my own money, so you don't have to pay for me or anything."

Touma held up a small coin purse to demonstrate her point.

"That's nonsense, Touma. I can't allow that."

Touma shook her head in that serious way of hers.

"No, no, I definitely can't permit that."

Haruka sighed. This kind of thing had been so much easier when they were younger. As they'd gotten older, they'd simultaneously acquired more money—she herself had greatly raised Chiaki's allowance—and a newfound awareness that, socially, it was no longer acceptable to make free use of others' cash.

Still, they were too young for her to allow them to spend their own money. She could still remember going to the beach, buying everyone a round of cold drinks, and watching them happily suck away at their straws. Just where had those days gone...

"Haruka? You there?"

Touma was waving her hand in her face.

"Well, let's not worry about this right now, okay? We'll talk about it later."

Privately, she planned to pay for Touma before she had a chance to protest and, even if she did, she felt certain Maki and the others would weigh in on her side.

"Ah, okay."

They walked in silence for a while, Touma plowing down the street with a determined stride in front of her, dodging pedestrians, and wearing a T-shirt with the logo of the school soccer team, a pair of jeans, and sports shoes. Thankfully, she seemed to have recently dropped her habit of wearing those ugly oversized shirts.

It was a start, but her clothing still showed little sign of great thought or planning. Haruka suspected Touma just threw on whatever was in her closet and went with it. It wasn't really her place to criticize it, but that wouldn't do at all.

For that matter, she could now get a better look at Touma's bust, which she was realizing was already larger than Chiaki's. Hmm. Yes, that settles it. She would definitely have to speak to Natsuki about Touma's clothing, both inner and outer. It would probably work better to just speak to Touma herself, but she was making it a point recently to bar Natsuki from delegating these tasks to her. Touma was growing too distant from her brothers, they agreed, and no time like the present to start pulling her back in.

"Haruka."

Touma had stopped suddenly at an intersection, peered outward, and turned around to face her. She suddenly noticed that Touma was already as tall as Kana. She would be a tall woman someday.

"What is it, Touma?"

"We seem to be going back into a residential district. Where are we going exactly?"

_That doesn't seem right..._

Haruka pulled a sheet of paper out of her pocket and peered at it.

"According to Hayami's directions, it should be easy to walk to the meeting point from my house, but this seems-"

Well acquainted with Haruka's fail points, Touma snatched the directions from her hand and glanced at them.

"Haruka, we shouldn't have turned right onto this street. It should have been left. We've been going the wrong way for fifteen minutes. See?"

Touma held up the instructions and gestured at them.

_Not again..._

"I'm so sorry..."

"No, no, don't worry. I go on long walks like this all the time."

"But you must be tired from the soccer..."

"No, I'm fine. I'm energetic. See?"1

Touma marched off back down the street, Haruka following with a crestfallen expression.

It was another twenty minutes before they reached the correct meeting point.

Maki, Atsuko, and unusually, Hitomi, were already there.

"Ah, Touma-kun came also?" said Maki.

Touma reacted a little at the "-kun," but said nothing.

Atsuko looked shocked, and kept looking at Touma like she couldn't believe her eyes.

"Is something wrong, Atsuko?"

"No, nothing, I just thought that-I mean, I always thought that Touma was-never mind, it's not important."

"Oh, is this one of your sisters? She's cute!" said Hitomi in her high voice, cutting in.

"Actually, I'm Natsuki's sister, Touma," said Touma.

"I decided to bring her too," said Haruka, telling a little white lie.

"Ah! Natsuki's sister!"

There was a pause as they all glanced briefly at Hitomi.

"Anyway, I'm sorry for being late," said Haruka.

"Don't worry about it! It's fine! We expected it," said Maki.2

"What does that-"

"Anyway, thanks for inviting me, Haruka-sempai!" Hitomi said, bowing slightly.

"You don't have to call me that. I graduated already."

"We tried telling her already, but she keeps doing it anyway," commented Atsuko quietly.

While the three of them commented on Touma, rubbing her head—despite her already being as tall as most of them-and telling her about how well she had grown, to Touma's slight embarrassment, Haruka took the opportunity to glance over their outfits.

Maki had shown up in a tank top and pants, similar to what Haruka was wearing, while both Atsuko and Hitomi had both gone with a long skirt and T-shirt. The colors were well-matched. It was good to see she wasn't underdressed for this.

Then she realized what was missing.

"Where's Hayami?"

"She called us to say she would go there separately," said Maki.

"I see."

They started walking off, Maki leading the way this time.

"You know, you look so mature, Haruka-senpai! I bet anyone seeing you walking around with Touma would think you were her mother. I'm so envious!" commented Hitomi.

"You know," said Maki. "That could easily be interpreted as you saying she looks old. Is that what you're trying to say, hmm?" She leaned with an evil smile in to look menacingly at Hitomi while walking.

"Eep! Well, you know, I didn't mean it like that!"

"Of course you didn't. Leave her alone, Maki."

Maki smiled mischievously, but backed off.

And just like that, they were there. It turned out the restaurant was only a block away from where they had met.

They looked up at the frontage.

"French? In a neighborhood like this?" asked Maki.

"Apparently the owner couldn't afford to open anywhere ritzy, so he decided to try opening here. There's some young star chef he thinks will rock the business once they get established, but no one believes in him since he hasn't even gone to cooking school. And then once they earn enough money, they can move. There was an article about this place in a magazine I read!"

Atsuko tagged on that last sentence in response to their inquiring looks.

"Well, he's on to something," said Touma, looking into the darkened windows. "The place is packed!"

"I wonder if we'll be able to get a seat," wondered Haruka.

"We can probably just get on some sort of waiting list. It's not like this place is all that formal. It's more like a café," commented Atsuko.

Haruka glanced at the number of people congregated around the front door. They would be here a while.

"Actually, isn't that Hayami-senpai?"

Hitomi pointed into the store.

Indeed, Hayami was waving at them from an empty table in the back.

"I deliberately got here early so we could get seats. The owner made a fuss about keeping a table empty at a time like this, but I pulled some strings."

"Strings? You?"

"You'll see what I meant. But you're lucky this table seats six. I didn't think you'd bring Touma-kun."

"Ah well…"

"Oh, you're really growing tall!" Hayami said as she turned towards Touma. "How are things going between you and Chiaki-chan?"

"What? Oh, uh…fine I guess."

"Good, good." Hayami walked behind Touma to pull back a chair for Atsuko. "And just remember, if things don't work out, you can always come talk to me for…advice."

Hayami seemed to be reaching down to grab something from her purse, but suddenly Touma flushed beet-red and jumped forward. Maki glared at Hayami.

It was always like this with Hayami. She had never been able to really place what was going on, but she always felt uneasy when any of her sisters, or their friends, were around Hayami. And they, in turn, seemed to be nervous around her.

As they all finally sat down, she heard Touma mutter to herself:

"Kana was right about her. She _is_ dangerous…"

After they finished ordering, they fell in to the main purpose of the day: chatting and gossip.

"So Maki, how's that new job going for you guys?"

"Oh excellent! The two of us are the best sales team in the store. Atsuko reels them in and then I make sure they buy the goods!"

"I see…"

"Interesting," said Hayami. "I might just visit sometime."

"I'm not letting you leave unless you buy something," warned Maki.

Next to her, Touma put away her gaming device to talk to Hitomi, who apparently had a deep interest in Touma's daily life.

"Anyway, can you believe this girl?" continued Maki, grabbing Atsuko by the shoulders and pulling her over, almost spilling her tea. "Guys keep confessing to her but she keeps turning them down. I think it's been what, five so far? I'm so jealous!"

"I'm just not ready," said Atsuko, eyes downcast and cheeks flush. "I just don't want to commit to anything until I at least graduate from college. That's what I tell them."

"Oh leave her alone, Maki. There's nothing wrong with that."

Hayami excused herself to go to the bathroom.

"Speaking of which," Maki continued, "how are things going with Kana-chan and Fujioka-kun?"

"It's going well, I guess." She took a sip of her tea. "I have to kick him out of the house basically every night. They make a cute couple."

"Are you watching them to make sure they don't…you know?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Well, you know, they're a young couple, they're in love, there are hormones involved…"

"Maki!" She felt her cheeks redden.

"Oh? So you've caught them at it?"

"No! Of course not!"

Maki sighed, and put her tea cup down.

"Well, it's a valid point. You have to talk to her about it at some point. You can't keep putting it off forever. This goes for Chiaki-chan, too."

"I…I know that. But I just have to convince myself to do it. That's all."

There was an anomalous moment of silence as even Hitomi and Touma stopped talking.

"Anyway, have you told them yet what you plan to do for your future?"

"How can I, when I don't even know myself?"

"You should consult with them and tell them what you're thinking about. I'm sure they'd appreciate it if you included them in the decision-making process. They must be wondering, too. You've been graduated for nearly a year now and not a word about a job or college! You're being irresponsible."

They all—except Touma and Hitomi, of course—stared at Maki in disbelief.

"Are-are you okay, Maki? Did something happen?" asked Atsuko dazedly.

She looked flustered for a moment, then looked down, pressing her fingers together.

"Well, you know, I figured it'd be interesting to act serious every once in a while. And that's really what I think."

"She's right," Atsuko agreed. "For example, if you're going to try to get that teacher's certification, they'd certainly want to know. This goes double if you end up going to a foreign university like you were thinking."

Touma suddenly choked on her tea and started coughing into a napkin.

"I can hear you guys, you know…"

"Oh!"

She brought her hands to her mouth.

"Sorry, I forgot you were-"

"Don't worry about it, I won't say anything."

Atsuko looked crestfallen, but the moment was broken when the waiter suddenly showed up with their food.

It was Touma who responded first, narrowly avoiding another incident with the tea.

"Natsuki?" she exclaimed.

_I didn't know he worked!_ she thought. _Does our school even allow this sort of thing? Did he get a waiver?_

_Well, it's not my place to ask_, she decided, cutting short her own train of thought.

"Hello," he responded, setting the plates of food in front of them.

They merely looked at him for a few moments, then turned to look at Touma.

"What? Don't look at me! He didn't tell us he got a job!"

"Correction. I told everyone. You just aren't home enough to know even basic things like that!"

For several seconds they just glared at each other, the tension in the air palpable.

_Natsuki didn't tell me things had gotten this bad! _ Haruka thought.

"Now, now," she said soothingly. "We came here to have fun! What a coincidence that we ran into you here, Natsuki!"

"Hayami didn't tell you? She came and told us beforehand you were coming."

"She did?"

"Us?" asked Maki.

"Ta-da!" interjected Hayami, suddenly appearing behind Natsuki. "I brought him!"

She turned and step back sideways, spreading her arms out to her sides in the necessary manner.

"Allow me to present to you, the star chef of this rest-"

"No one is there, Hayami," said Maki.

"What?" She opened her eyes and turned to look.

"Goddamn it, Hosaka. I see you back there! What are you doing just standing in the corner like that instead of following me? Another one of your insane fantasies?"

She marched over to where they now saw a man in a chef's hat, looking up at the ceiling with his eyes closed and doing something with his shirt.

"Kimochi Warui..." commented Maki. "Damn that Hayami! Catching me with my guard down."

"Hosaka? Hosaka is the star chef here?" said Atsuko.

"Who is this Hosaka?" asked Touma.

"He's Natsuki's best friend. You don't know him?" asked Haruka.

Touma shook her head.

Finally, the man showed up, pushed from behind by Hayami and with a fresh redness to his cheek where Hayami had slapped him awake.

"H-hello."

He seemed uncomfortable for some reason.

"Come on! Don't you have more to say than that?" asked Hayami, slapping his back.

He seemed at an utter loss for words and began sweating profusely, and obviously.

Suddenly Haruka remembered the last time she had seen him.

"Oh, wow, it really has been a long time. Why didn't you come by more often? You're sweating so much, let me wipe it off."

She pulled out a handkerchief and reached over to the now catatonic Hosaka.

"Damn it Hosaka, now's not the time for this!" said Hayami.

"No!" He suddenly exclaimed, turning suddenly. "This isn't right! Conditions aren't perfect!"

He fled back precipitously to the kitchen.

"Don't wig out on me now, Hosaka! Come back here!" exclaimed Hayami, chasing him.

"Kimochi warui..." Maki reiterated.

"I'm going to go help her deal with Hosaka. You guys, uh, enjoy the meal." said Natsuki, looking back over his shoulder.

"O-okay." said Hitomi suddenly, whom Haruka realized was blushing. Touma, already eating her food, had her head turned, studying Hitomi carefully.

_What bad manners!_ reflected Haruka. _And what on earth is going on here?_

Maki sighed, and Atsuko noted that Haruka was wearing her all-too-common overwhelmed expression. People around the room stopped staring and returned to their own conversations.

"Hmm..." commented Touma to herself, wearing a strange expression.

"Is something wrong, Touma-kun?" asked Atsuko.

"No, nothing. It's probably just my imagination. This is really good, though."

"Really, I'm surprised. I didn't even know he could cook," said Haruka, preparing to dig into her pasta.

"No, Haruka," said Maki, grabbing her hand. "You can't eat that."

"What are you talking about? Why not?"

"Because that's, uh, er...well..."

Maki wore a pained expression, clearly trying to come up with a reason on the spot.

Haruka ignored her and started eating.

"Actually...this tastes really familiar. But I don't think I've ever eaten anything he's cooked."

"Familiar?" asked Maki, who herself started to eat.

"Yeah, but I'm trying to remember where I've tasted this before..."

Maki's eyes flew wide open.

"Ah, did you remember something, Maki?"

Maki looked away, breaking eye contact.

"No, not at all."

Haruka wondered what Maki was hiding.

"I'm really impressed," said Atsuko. "Not bad at all. If only he didn't act so weird all the time..."

"No, Atsuko. You can't start thinking like that. That's dangerous," warned Maki.

Hayami emerged from the kitchen, a defeated look on her face and a fresh sauce stain on her pants.

"I couldn't get him to come back out. Sorry, guys."

"It's alright. He 's probably just shy..." said Atsuko.

She seemed to be thinking about something.

Touma finished her food and began eying the dishes around her.

* * *

As they began waving the rest goodbye, Hayami suddenly dashed forward with a parcel.

"Oh, I almost forgot. Here's a gift from Hosaka."

She held up a bottle in a paper bag.

"What is it?"

"Premium-grade sake."

"Oh I see."

At least she wasn't calling it "juice" this time. After the last couple of times, she and Maki had put two and two together. They had never confronted Hayami about it, but had agreed to be more careful around it. She wouldn't drink any of it, but considering it was a gift...

"Thank him for me."

"I will."

It would be useful when they had guests over.

Haruka and Touma began heading back.

"Are you sure you don't want to just spend the rest of the day with Natsuki? It would be convenient."

"Yeah. I'm sure."

"I see..."

Haruka watched Touma's back as they steadily marched forward.

"Is it really good to be spending all your time away from home?"

"I don't see anything wrong with it."

Touma didn't look back to answer.

"Still...Natsuki tells me he worries about you. Is that really alright?"

"Tell him not to worry. After all-"

Touma stopped dead in her tracks and spun to look at Haruka.

"I have you and Chiaki. That should be fine, right?"

Touma smiled and it was clear she was trying to defuse the conversation with flattery.

"But that's-"

_-not really enough._

But she let the words die stillborn on her lips.

_Why can't I say these things?_

"By the way..." Touma began.

"Yes?"

"That stuff you guys were talking about earlier, about you leaving the country, was it true?"

Haruka sighed.

"It's just something I'm considering. Maki and Atsuko really think I should and I do sort of want to go..."

She paused just a little.

"...but I don't think I can leave my sisters behind. I don't want to. It's too much for now."

"Then why not just tell them you're not going to do it?"

She looked into Haruka's eyes, searching for something.

"...it's because you can't really give it up, right?"

"It's just too early. I don't want to be..."

_...so alone._

But she didn't say that either.

"It's okay. I understand. You need to watch Kana, right?"

"What?"

"What Maki-san was talking about earlier. You need to make sure she doesn't do whatever it is you guys keep alluding to. What's so dangerous about it?"

"Why not ask Natsuki about it? It's his job after all."

"Is it now. Ugh, whatever. It's not a big deal."

_But it is, of course._

They finally reached the housing complex.

* * *

They returned to find Kana and the others already back and, seated along with them at the kotatsu, Takeru.

Leaving Touma to sit on the floor and chat with Chiaki, she greeted him.

"Oh, welcome!"

"Ah, good day."

"I'm sorry for intruding."

"No, no. It's no problem. I apologize for not being here. Today was actually a pretty bad day to visit. If these three hadn't returned early, there would have been no one here. Actually, why are you guys back so early?"

"It's because of this idiot here," said Kana, gesturing at Fujioka with her thumb.

"I told you I was sorry already!"

"Hmph. Anyway, what is that you're carrying?"

"This? Oh, it's a bottle of sake I got from Hayami. Actually, that reminds me; let me pour you some, oji-san!"

"Ah, thanks, but I don't want to-"

"It's no problem! Let me get a cup."

When she stepped back into the room with the cup of sake, she accidentally eavesdropped a little on what Touma was saying.

"You're going to ask tonight? Why?"

"I'm just tired of not knowing," said Chiaki, who turned to look at Haruka.

"Oh, Haruka-nee-sama! Is it alright if Touma stays here for the night?"

"Again?"

"Well, there's no school tomorrow, so..."

Haruka briefly considered putting her foot down and insisting that Touma return home, but...

"That's fine, just keep the noise levels down this time, okay? And don't stay up so late! That goes for you too, Kana."

"I got it, I got it."

...she didn't do it.

"Anyway, isn't it time you be heading home?" said Kana, glaring at Fujioka.

"Kana! Don't be rude! Let him stay for dinner at least."

"Hmph."

* * *

That night, after Takeru left, Haruka started sorting the dry dishes back into the cabinets. Touma had already unrolled the sleeping mat, and Haruka could hear the three of them loudly playing some sort of game in their bedroom.

She almost knocked over a cup on the counter.

"Hmm? A full cup? How did Kana miss this? She's so careless sometimes! I practically have to wash the dishes again after she does them..."

The strong smell of alcohol interrupted her grumbling to herself.

"...and Takeru didn't even drink more than a sip. I have to pour it out, but what a waste..."

She remembered the last time she had drunk some of Hayami's juice.

_It wasn't bad..._

She looked around to make sure no one was looking and drank the whole thing herself.

_That's refreshing!_

_Hmm...I really shouldn't but...as long as I'm careful, it won't matter much. It might even help with the dreams._

_Alright, another cup then._

* * *

She woke the next day with a splitting headache.

_Why does my head hurt so much? What happened last night?_

She tried to remember, and found she couldn't. Then she remembered why this experience was familiar.

New Years, the first time Hayami had showed up with her supposed imported juice. Numerous times afterward.

_Damn it. How could I?_

She looked at the clock.

_11 PM? I need to vacuum! And breakfast!_

She jumped straight out of bed, then staggered backward as the hangover hit her.

_Okay, steady now..._

She successfully changed, and walked out to head the bathroom.

"Oh, Touma, you're still here?"

Touma's eyes widened.

"Uh, yes. We all slept in. Since, you know. I'll be going soon. Haha."

She seemed nervous for some reason.

"I told you guys not to stay up so late...I don't even have the right to say that today."

After brushing her teeth-and noting her ghoulish appearance in the mirror-she found Chiaki in the living room, seated at the Kotatsu.

"Ah, Haruka-nee-sama. It's alright. We just had some snacks for breakfast and Kana is making curry for lunch. You don't have to strain yourself. Especially..."

Chiaki's voice dropped off, and she seemed unusually fidgety. What was going on here?

She had a flash of insight.

"What-just what happened last night? What did I do?"

"That was really impressive, you know," said Kana, sticking her head in from the kitchen. "Even _I_ didn't know most of that stuff. I had no idea you were so knowledgeable."

"What-what did I say?"

"You don't remember? Ah, well, it's better that you don't."

"Kana! Just tell me!"

Kana ignored her.

"Kana!"

_1__I'm reluctant to start using Japanese phraseology, but "Genki!" (Literally,"(I'm) energetic/healthy!" but often used like "I'm fine!") is actually the perfect phrase for Touma to say here. I've tried to convey a similar effect here in the English._

_2__Again, "Daijoubu" (Literally "Have no worries!", often used as "Don't worry about it!" and "It's fine!") is the perfect phrase for Maki here..._


End file.
